Thursday, March 6, 2014

Dust

I had volunteered to lector for the Ash Wednesday Mass, and when I arrived in the sacristy before Mass, Dave, the sacristan, asked me if I would help distribute ashes.  With forty-eight years of experience as an ash-receiver to my credit, I had never once distributed ashes before, and I found the experience to be deeply moving.

Dave handed me a small card with the words "Turn away from sin and be faithful to the Gospel" written upon it.  I clutched the card tightly during the first half of Mass and glanced at it over and over again, afraid that I would forget the words.

When the time came to distribute the ashes, Fr. Joe invited those who were helping to come to the front of church to receive their ashes first.  When he firmly placed the cross of ashes upon my forehead, Fr. Joe said, "Remember, you are dust, and to dust you shall return."  Maybe he didn't get the cue card, I thought.  But I decided that it would be easier to remember to speak about dust as I was smearing it upon foreheads and so I followed Fr. Joe's example.  After the helpers received their ashes, Fr. Joe turned to me and asked me to place the ashes upon his forehead.

My hand trembled as I shoved my thumb into the dish of ashes, and faintly drew a cross upon Fr. Joe's forehead,  whispering the reminder to him that he was dust.  Something about this sinful woman reminding a holy priest of his littleness felt extremely humbling.  But maybe it wasn't because he was a priest.  Maybe, I was soon to discover with each forehead that was presented to me, distributing ashes was meant to humble the distributor as much as the receiver.  

The church was standing room only, and soon I was smearing crosses upon the elderly, children and babies.  It wasn't long before it felt like a physically taxing exercise as I bent down for the children and reached up for those who were tall.  When my two youngest children and my husband stood before me, all smiles, I recalled all of the moments when I had traced the cross upon their forehead in a blessing, with a clean and dry thumb, sans the ashes, and the words, "God bless you" instead of "You are dust."  
source

With each person who stood before me, waiting for the reminder of their sinful humanity as they embarked upon yet another Lenten season,  I thought of Christ, with his face down in the dirt of the Via Dolorosa during his three falls and I wished I were wiping the dirt off of their faces, like Veronica, instead of marking them with it.  And yet, when I washed the ashes off my own forehead before I went to bed that night, I prayed that a faint shadow of the cross would remain, reminding me of my need for Him and my gratitude for all that He suffered for the likes of me.

Marked

I receive the ashes that label me as His child, His own.

The dust flakes down into my eyes, flirting with my lashes and
blurring my vision of worldly things, reminding me that the
spiritual realm can often contain that which is dirty, dusty and dark.

The ash that marks me settles deep within my soul,
mingling with the sorrow and joy that God's love
has carefully placed within my life.

I am marked as His own and will carry that mark
from my forehead to my soul
beyond this season of Lent and into forever.


12 comments:

  1. I love both the post and the poem, Anne - thank you. We are blessed to be "marked" as Christ's!
    May you and your family have a blessed Lent!

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  2. A blessed Lent to you and your family as well, Mary! Thank you so much for your kind comment!

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  3. What a beautiful honor for a beautiful soul! I always love how the Holy Spirit works through you and the ministries you are called to. May your Lent be fruitful and blessed, dear Anne!

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  4. hum... how do I illustrate that? Wonderful as always. +C

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  5. Huh! So that is the words which are supposed to be said. I wondered. I think my priest, who knows me well, wanted to make sure I was humbled enough, so when he made the sign of the cross with ashes on my forehead he said: "You dirtbag!"

    (just kiddin' ) It was a great honor for you, Anne, and well deserved. And you so well understood what it was you were doing, and receiving.

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  6. Anne - this is very powerful. I, too, got to distribute ashes for the first time this Wednesday. I was given the choice between both sayings, and chose "be faithful to the Gospel". I'm not sure why, especially since I grew up with priests using the "ashes" quote. I guess it just moved me.

    God Bless you and I hope you have a spiritual Lent.

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  7. Beautiful post and poem, dear Anne! I love that you said "Dust thou art...." instead of the newer version. I miss hearing that. I need to be reminded that I am truly dust...it's so good for the soul. Being marked with the cross of ashes reminds me that one day we will "bear His Name on our foreheads..." I can't wait! I love being marked for God. Thank you for all you do and share! You are precious. May your Lent continue to be blessed! xox

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  8. Hello,
    Do you really love God?
    If ye love me, keep my commandments. -John 14:15
    True Sabbath is Friday sunset to Saturday sunset, RC changed the
    Sabbath day and admits it:

    “Of course the Catholic Church claims that the change (Saturday
    Sabbath to Sunday) was her act… And the act is a MARK of her
    ecclesiastical authority in religious things.” H.F. Thomas,
    Chancellor of Cardinal Gibbons. Nov. 11, 1895
    How important is to observe the Sabbath
    But as for you, speak to the sons of Israel, saying, ‘You shall
    surely observe My sabbaths; for this is a sign between Me and you
    throughout your generations, that you may know that I am the LORD
    who sanctifies you.’Therefore you are to observe the sabbath, for
    it is holy to you. Everyone who profanes it shall surely be put to
    death; for whoever does any work on it, that person shall be cut
    off from among his people.…-Exodus 31:13, 31:14
    Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am
    not come to destroy, but to fulfil. Matthew 5:17
    At the judgement day you can´t say you haven´t been warned
    More info about
    Sabbath:http://www.almightywind.com/sabbath/truesabbathday.htm

    ReplyDelete
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