"I say to myself, I will not mention His name, I will speak in His name no more. But then, it becomes like a fire burning in my heart, imprisoned in my bones, I grow weary holding it in, I cannot endure it." Jeremiah 20:7-10
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Calling Me Closer
Having just come from Tiffany's blog, Family at the Foot of the Cross, I find that I have been deeply moved by her story of a recent experience at Adoration where she witnessed a woman who was clearly in a deep love relationship with the Lord, and I feel that my whole perspective on my relationship with the Lord has been challenged.
Whenever I go to Adoration or attend a group Holy Hour or daily Mass, I always sit in the back (unless I'm the lector.) I guess it's my way of saying I'm not worthy to come closer and I also enjoy being able to see all of the other people who are there, drawing a feeling of loving community from them, realizing that we are all there to offer praise and worship to the Lord. I'd been in the habit of looking at all of the people gathered as one, and I always ask God to please hear all of our prayers, not simply my own.
But, maybe I've got it wrong-maybe I should be right in front, as close as I can get. Perhaps God is calling me to come closer in prayer and not let all of the other people distract me from Him. Maybe for the short time that I spend in worship at Church and at Adoration Chapels, He wants me all for Himself and wants me to feel His love as a gift for me alone. Could it be that through that hour of close and loving rest near His Eucharistic Heart, I will be strengthened to carry on with all of the responsibilities for which He has commissioned me?
O Lord, draw me close to you. Let me inside of Your Most Sacred Heart, where love and peace abound. Give me the courage and the strength to carry on Your will for me in this world of temptation and pain. Keep me forever within Your love. Amen.
One of the things that has really helped me to put things into perspective is the spiritual example of St. Therese of Lisieux. Her thought, to become like a child, is so insightful. I imagine that I am a child who is completely enveloped in her Papa's arms. Children don't doubt their own adequacy. They run unabashedly into the arms of the one whose love never fails them. That is why I love being a mother. I get to see love from the perspective of my children who aren't yet bogged down by the world and its doubts.
ReplyDeleteGreat post, as always, and a beautiful picture of our Eucharistic Lord.
Another great post. I look forward to Adoration each and every week. It is the best hour or two of my entire week. Your post has also caused me to rethink where I sit and kneel while there. I too sit in the back and observe the other members of our Parish family there. Thanks for your uplifting words.
ReplyDeleteYour post has helped me think about where I sit in Church period. Believe it or not, I sit all over the place - sometimes in the front, sometimes in the back - and never really think about it differently. Maybe I should ...
ReplyDeleteGod Bless.