Purging the Past, Entering the Reality of Now

Justin,  the de-clutterer, at the beginning and end of his scholarly career

I'm in a purge mode this summer and have decided to go through my house from top to bottom recklessly tossing out anything deemed to be, in my opinion, extraneous.  It was my son Justin, the recent high school graduate, who got me started on this goal toward clutter-free living.  In the week after he graduated, but before he began his full-time summer job, he systematically emptied out kitchen cabinets and junk drawers, extravagantly tossing out nearly everything.  I'd come home from work and find the cupboards practically bare.  And I liked it.  Suddenly everything seemed so clean and bright and I don't miss the things he threw out at all.  Really, I couldn't even tell you what they were!  It just goes to show how little I needed those items I had piled up and saved!  Now I've taken it upon myself to continue Justin's work and I have been scandalously eschewing the unnecessary melange from my home including my prayer journals.

In the few years prior to writing this blog, I kept prayer journals where I recorded my daily prayers based upon scripture verses from the daily Mass readings, a sort of written lectio divina. It was a time of my life where my suffering from depression was deep and the prayer journals served a very helpful purpose in bringing about my healing.  But now, as I read through them one last time before I forever renounce them, I find that I am more than happy to kiss the past good-bye and to accept my beautiful life as God has brought me to it in the present moment.  I am so grateful to find that those old books filled with words of sorrow and the struggle for joy no longer reflect who I really am today.

And yet, those years of journal writing were also years of voracious spiritual reading for me, and whenever I would read something that touched my heart or inspired me, I'd have to write it in my prayer journal so I'd never forget it.  Now I've come across some terrific quotes that I had saved and rather than toss them to the insignificance of yesterday with the rest of the household trash where they would be forever lost, I have decided to share them here on this blog where they will hopefully be a source of inspiration for others...

So I begin with these:

From My Monastery is a Minivan by Denise Roy regarding her childhood dream of becoming a priest (much like St. Therese of Lisieux):

"Here I sit, twenty years later, no longer wondering what I'm going to be when I grow up.  I've arrived.  And guess what?  My childhood dreams have come true.

For two decades, I have broken bread, poured grape juice, preached, prayed, told stories, bestowed blessings, taken care of the sick, heard confessions.  I have been a parent.  These have been the sacraments of my daily life and, I suspect, of yours.  These are simple, sacred acts.  These are how we mediate love, as we minister to our own little congregations-children, spouse, family and friends.

I have discovered that it is a great vocation."

From my favorite author, Carryl Houselander:

"For the moment, the precious and only now, you alone are the bearer of the Blessed Sacrament into your own little world.  You are the monstrance, the priest giving Communion, the Real Presence, to your husband, your children and your friends; and the reason why, or one reason why, Christ has given Himself to you, is because He wishes to be with them, as things are, only through you.  This is an astonishing thought, as every thought about the Blessed Sacrament is, if you bring an ounce of courage and realism to it."

And one more journal scribble that I found to be irresistibly worth saving, from a conversation during my daughter's basketball game with the graduate pictured above:

Justin:  "Mom, why don't you talk to some of these other parents here?"
Me:  "Because I don't have anything to say to them."
Justin:  "Yes you do!  Just ask, 'So how's Jesus working for you?'"  ;)

Vocations Testimony-A Parent's Perspective

St. Monica's Parish in Whitefish Bay hosted a special Vocations Mass and talks on Sunday, November 18th.  Fr. Luke Strand, the energetic director of vocations for the Archdiocese of Milwaukee, said Mass, and then spoke briefly after Mass about his own vocation story and his work with the young people in the Archdiocese as vocations director.  His talk was followed by three beautiful Schoenstatt Sisters of Mary who shared their own personal call stories.  Finally, yours truly was asked to speak about a parent's perspective regarding my son, John, who is a college freshman at St. Joseph's College Seminary at Loyola University in Chicago which will be followed by four years at St. Francis de Sales Seminary in Milwaukee.  The text of my talk is below.

John, on the right, with Domenick, one of  his brother seminarians

When I tell people that my son is a seminarian, I am often met with mixed reactions.  The majority of people congratulate me and I can genuinely feel that they think it’s wonderful for a young man to give his life to God.  But sometimes, I get questions that are tinged with disdain, such as “You’re son wants to be a priest and you’re ok with that?”  By their reaction I get the feeling that they disapprove of my encouraging John to the priesthood.

Have you ever heard the saying “No priest, no Jesus?”  Who else can bring about the transformation of a simple piece of bread into the very Body of our Lord Jesus but the priest at the altar?  And who am I to prevent this from happening by trying to hold back the hand of God when he chooses a young man to service in the Church?  If my son is called to the priesthood, then I am also called to support and encourage him.

But, I don’t intend to make it seem as though giving your child to the church is a terribly difficult situation, because really, all of our children are destined to grow up and move away, aren’t they?  Letting go can be difficult for everyone, regardless of the vocational call that our children receive. 

I’ll never forget when my fourth son, Jack, was born.  A woman from church came to the hospital to give me communion and she commented, “You poor dear!  Four sons!  They are all going to grow up and leave you when they get married!”  Shocked at the negativity of a stranger during a moment of great joy in my life, I shot back, “Well, maybe they’ll all grow up to be priests and leave me anyway!”  And I think it was at that moment that I became more aware of the need to be open to God’s will, not only in my life, but also in the lives of my children.  They belong to God, after all, and He has graciously seen fit to share them with me for a little while, to entrust their upbringing to the greatly unskilled hands of my husband and I.  And so I never prayed for my children to be healthy, successful, smart, or happy.  My constant prayer for all of my children has been “Please God, make them holy.  Help them to know You and Your will for them and let them follow it.”  I’m not saying that I don’t want all of these other things for my children, but just that God’s will always has to be first, and then everything else will follow according to His plan.

And so I look back at my son John’s life up to this point with a careful eye to the will of God and I wonder about so many things...

 

When John was two years old I picked up a book on a sale rack at Kmart of all places, about the life of St. Paul. Despite the fact that it was written in a fairly dry fashion, this book became one of John’s favorites and he asked me to read it to him over and over again which I did, even though I would have rather read something entertaining like Dr. Suess’ Cat in the Hat.  Could it be that God was planting the seeds of his vocation even then?  Had I insisted on reading Dr. Suess instead of the life of St. Paul, would that have thwarted God’s plan in some small way?  

And when he was in the fifth grade and first began to talk about an interest in the priesthood, Paul and I listened and offered encouragement, happy that he had a deep interest in his faith. And we smiled on the sidelines as he became increasingly involved in the Church as an altar server, choir member, lector, member of the Respect Life Committee, Youth Committee and Vocations Committee, and as he spent more and more time at the seminary participating in every program that they offered for youth.  We could see that he had a fire burning brightly in his soul and he eagerly participated in every opportunity that came his way.  But what if we would have discouraged his involvement in so many church activities?  Would he have tried to stifle the voice of God that was speaking to him so clearly?  

When it was time for him to enter middle school and he insisted on being enrolled at our parish school rather than continue in the public schools, we were astonished at his bold request, but we allowed him to attend the Catholic School where he felt closest to God.  Had we insisted that he remain in public schools, would that have dampened his zeal for the Lord? 

I may never have the answers to those questions, but I do know that John was feeling the subtle tug of God for most of his life and he was making his love for his Catholic faith known to us and like any parent who loves their child, we tried to support his desires which stemmed from our own values, and to encourage them. 

After years of watching John grow ever more deeply into his faith and ever more involved in the church, the day to release him to God’s providence finally arrived.  We drove him to Chicago to begin his seminary career.   I am extremely proud of my son, despite any fears that I may have about how this long and difficult road will play out for him.  I don’t know if he or any of our seminarians will make it all the way through the eight arduous years of seminary life culminating in ordination to the priesthood, but I do know that they all have a much better chance of success with the support of our prayers behind them.  As a mother, all I can do is let go and trust that God has John exactly where He wants him and to thank God for allowing John to respond so beautifully to His call, and to continue to pray for him with all I’ve got.

And you can do the same thing for your children, as well as for the children of your friends and family members, that is, you can encourage them to listen to the voice of God speak to them and to respond in love.  How can you do this?

Pray for them!  Pray for the young people you know; encourage them whenever they show any interest in the Catholic faith.  And pray with them!  Lead them to holiness by your own example. Teach them to pray those prayers that have been passed down through the centuries as well as in their own words. Invite them to spend some time in silence before our Eucharistic Lord to hear God speak to their hearts. Take them to Mass, not just weekly, but can I be so bold as to suggest daily?  Try it for just one day a week.  See if you can’t make it work into your schedule and then watch how God works not only in the hearts of your children but in your heart as well.

In regards to encouraging and praying for an increase in vocations for all young people, I want to share a passage from one of my favorite authors, Caryll Houselander, from her book The Passion of the Infant Christ: 

"A young priest was celebrating his first Mass. In the front of the church his mother and his young brothers knelt. It was easy to know them by their likeness to him-a family of dark, golden-skinned boys, and the mother like them.

When the Mass was ended, and the new priest came back into the sanctuary for the blessing and the kissing of the consecrated hands, the family hesitated shyly, almost paralyzed by wonder and love; and before they could go first (as they should have done) to the altar rails, the crowd had pushed past them, strangers had taken their place. The faithful were flocking around their new shepherd, and his mother and his brothers had become part of the crowd, waiting their turn until the end.

For one moment the young priest looked over the bowed heads into his mother's eyes, and his face shone.

"My mother and my brethren are they who hear the word of God and do it."

Because the priesthood had made him the Christ of the people, he belonged to them; he was their kith and kin, their son and brother, their Christ, their priest at the altar.”

I like this passage because it clearly shows that every new priest who reaches his ordination day is a son to us all, a member of our own families.  Shouldn’t we all take an active part then, in helping to foster vocations to the priesthood and religious life, in giving all of our sons a helping hand to the priesthood?  We’re all responsible for the growth of our Church.  So, here’s a few ways that you can help:

The MonthlyPrayer Request for Priests is a website where you will find all of the priests of the Archdiocese of Milwaukee listed in alphabetical order and I ask that you pray for each priest on his specific day.  You will also find the priests names listed in the Milwaukee Catholic Herald.  Some parishes also list the priests in their bulletin and if your parish doesn’t list them, perhaps you could ask them to begin!

Rosesfor Our Lady is a lay apostolate that has been active in the Archdiocese of Milwaukee for over 30 years.  Our main purpose is to promote Marian and Eucharistic devotion.  We hold a monthly holy hour for vocations on the second Sunday of every month at St. Francis de Sales Seminary at 2 PM and everyone is welcome and encouraged to join us and to pray with us for an increase in holy vocations to the priesthood and religious life.  Our next holy hour will be on Sunday, December 9^th and we will be led in prayer by Bishop Don Hying, our spiritual advisor. 

Finally, if you’d like to add some practical work to your prayer, please sign up to volunteer to help the vocations office with mailings, phone calls and preparing food for special vocation office events.  If you sign up to help with the practical work, I will be contacting you from time to time to help with events as needed.  (Dear reader:  Send me an email if you're in the Milwaukee area and want to help with this!  I'll be happy to include you!)

I thank you for coming here today to this special Vocations Mass and for your interest in helping to promote and increase vocations to the priesthood and religious life in the Archdiocese of Milwaukee and I particularly thank the vocations committee at St. Monica's for inviting me to share my story, my heart, with you.  May God richly reward you always and may He bring about the increase in vocations for which we pray!

A Vocations Homily by Deacon Paul Schneider, OFM Conv.

"He sat down opposite the treasury and observed how the crowd put money into the treasury.  Many rich people put in large sums.  A poor widow also came and put in two small coins worth a few cents.  Calling his disciples to himself, he said to them,  "Amen, I say to you, this poor widow put in more than all the other contributors to the treasury.  For they have all contributed from their surplus wealth, but she, from her poverty, has contributed all she had, her whole livelihood."
~Mark 12:41-44

My husband Paul and I with Deacon Paul Schneider

It is such an honor for me to be part of a wonderful organization, Roses for Our Lady, that holds monthly holy hours for vocations.  Each month a group of about 30 individuals gathers at the chapel at St. Francis de Sales Seminary in front of our Eucharistic Lord to pray for holy vocations to the priesthood and religious life.  We are blessed to have many priests,deacons and a bishop who volunteer their time to come and assist us at our holy hours, offering beautiful reflections to inspire us in our prayer.

Today my dear friend and fellow Oblate of the Precious Blood, Deacon Paul Schneider, OFM Conv. joined us in prayer.  Deacon Paul had entered the seminary many years ago, left for a while and has now returned and will be ordained to the priesthood this May so I ask you to please keep him in your prayers in a special way during these final months of his preparation.  As the mother of a seminarian, the words he shared with us regarding today's gospel reading were so touching that they moved me to tears.  I wanted to share them here with you, as well, dear reader, so that you might also find your heart lifted by his reflection:

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In today's Gospel we find Jesus seated in the temple watching people give their donation for the upkeep of the synagogue. Usually thirteen trumpet-shaped containers were set up to collect donations.  People in the time of Jesus did not use paper money as we do today but rather they used coins.  Some of these coins were small and very light while the more valuable ones were heavier and larger.  You can imagine the noise that was being made when people dropped their donations into the collection box:  some people were very humble when they put in their donations trying not to make too much noise and not draw attention to themselves; some put their donations in grudgingly, kind of throwing it in; while others made a big deal of it and created quite a noise as they put their coins into the container.  They wanted to make sure everyone heard how much they were giving and wanted everyone to notice who was making all the noise.  For these people it is more about the honor they received from others, it is all about me and what I am getting out of the deal, than it was about giving out of generosity to the synagogue.

But then a poor widow came forward and put in two small coins.  A widow during the time of Jesus was considered very vulnerable and helpless, especially if she didn't have any children.  Many times she had to depend upon the generosity of friends and family just to have the basics of food because a woman during this time was not able to inherit any of her husband's wealth or property.  So the money that this widow gave did not come from her surplus wealth.  More than likely, the money she gave was money she needed to buy food or other necessities of life.  Each coin that she gave represented a day's wage for an unskilled worker, probably the only work that she was able to find for that week.  It is interesting that Jesus did not evaluate the amount of her contribution compared to those who were rich.  Rather he spoke of the source of her offering.  The wealth donated from their surplus; they gave what they did not need.  While the woman donated what little she had; she gave from what she needed.  By giving from her need she implied an absolute trust in God.

As I was thinking about this reading, my own mother came to mind.  She is a widow and while she is not poor, if she watches her pennies she is able to live a relatively comfortable life.  I was thinking about all of the sacrifices that she had to make throughout her life when I realized that probably one of the biggest sacrifices she had to make involved my own vocation.  Usually when we talk about vocations, we focus upon the aspect that a vocation is a call from God.  Sometimes that call involves having to give up things that at one time we considered important in our lives.  Especially if you are an older vocation, it might mean having to give up a job you really like, selling your house that you worked so hard to buy, or moving to a different part of the country away from your family and friends.  But we do it because we believe that it is God who is calling us to the religious life or to the priesthood.  We are willing to give up what at one time seemed so important to us and we trust that God will provide everything that we need for our vocation.

We forget that every vocation not only affects the person called, but it also affects our family and friends.  By my saying yes to God, my mom also had to say yes to my call.  I don't think I spend enough time thanking her for her yes and for what she had to give to God in order for me to be where I am today.  While most of our families consider it a great honor to have a son or a daughter who has answered the call of a vocation, it does involve a great sacrifice for them.  By my mom saying yes, she had to offer to God the distance of her son moving 800 miles away from her.  I am not able to just jump in the car to go for a quick visit.  Even though we talk on the phone, it is not the same as a personal visit.  She had to offer up the notion that I would have children and carry on the family name.

To me, she and all mothers, and fathers for that matter, of men and women who are following a call to religious life or to the priesthood are like the widow in today's reading.  They have contributed all they have to the Church.  They have absolute trust in God that he will supply what they need.  That is the reason why the mother of a priest is held in such high esteem, because of the sacrifice she made when she gave her son to the Church.  In my own mother's case, even though our lives aren't the same as it used to be, she has gained 41 new sons.  Every time my mom visits me, she is treated like a queen.  Each friar in my province considers her as their own mother, even if they are meeting her for the first time.

We entrust our mothers to the care of the Heavenly Mother.  Who else would know better the joy of having a son as a priest and at the same time knowing the heartache that goes along with it?

I believe it is a fantastic thing you are doing by gathering each month to pray for vocations.  I am sure that is a big part of the reason why vocations to the priesthood in the Archdiocese are increasing each year.  But I also ask you to keep the mothers and fathers of perspective vocations in your prayers.  You don't know how many people I talk to who pray for vocations on a daily basis, but when asked if their own son might have a vocation to the priesthood they quickly answer no.  They want their son to get married and have a family or want their son to have a good job so that he could help support his parents in their old age.  They pray for vocations, just as long as it is not their own son.  I remember when I was a freshman in college just after graduating from high school when I told my dad that I was thinking of entering the seminary to become a priest.  He didn't know what to make of it and didn't speak to me for six weeks.  But he later became one of my biggest supporters and was the one who was the most disappointed when I left the seminary a couple of years later.

Prayers for vocations are so important.  I attribute my vocation to people like you praying for vocations.  Continue to pray for vocations and pray that families may have the strength and trust to be able to give their son to the Church, that they, too, might say yes.  It makes our yes a little easier.

Deacon Paul and his mom with Bishop Hying

An Ardent Call for Vocations

“When we are in the presence of the Lord in the monstrance it’s perpetuating the moment of consecration at Mass.”  ~Fr. Luke Strand, Vocations Director for the Archdiocese of Milwaukee

Every once in a while a speaker touches my heart in such a way that I become convicted of the need to take action; to do my part to bring about the kingdom of God here on earth.  I recently had the opportunity to listen to Fr. Luke Strand, the Vocations Director for the Archdiocese of Milwaukee, give a talk about vocations to the de Chantal Society, a group of women who are fervent in their willingness to support vocations, and who gather several times each year at St. Francis de Sales Seminary for Eucharistic adoration, Benediction, an inspirational talk and socialization.  I was so grateful that I had jotted down a few notes during his talk because his words were very powerful.  What follows are highlights from Fr. Luke’s talk:

Young men who are discerning a call to the priesthood have a conviction of our Lord’s undying presence in their lives.  It is an act of faith to say “yes” to the Lord.  But there is a serious tension that exists in their hearts.  The priesthood is not understood in our world today...continue reading at Catholicmom.com

Take Only Your Walking Stick

"He told them to take nothing for their journey except a walking stick--no food, no traveler's bag, no money." ~Mark 6:8


St. Francis de Sales Seminary has a wonderful new vocations director, Fr. Luke Strand, (pictured next to Bishop Hying) and he is just full of energy and fabulous ideas!  He has begun a new initiative called Mission Milwaukee which is a young adult outreach of the Archdiocese of Milwaukee, a project for the New Evangelization.  Every Tuesday night a group of about 40 young men gather at St. Robert's Parish in Shorewood for dinner and fellowship and a group of women gather at the Newman Center at the University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee for dinner and fellowship, as well.  Then they all join each other for a holy hour and benediction followed by Mass.  At the end of the evening, the men return to St. Robert's Parish for night prayer.

As part of Mission Milwaukee, Fr. Luke has also organized a walking pilgrimage from St. Francis de Sales Seminary to the Basilica of Mary, Help of Christians at Holy Hill.  The pilgrimage covers about 50 miles on foot and is expected to last four days from start to finish.  My son John is taking part in this pilgrimage.  He is on the front right-hand side in the above picture.

The pilgrimage began with Mass at 7:30 AM on Thursday, July 18th and then proceeded to Bishop Hying's office at the Cousin's Center for a blessing.  The morning of the first day included stops at several churches along the way until they arrived at St. Anthony's Parish on Mitchell St. for morning prayer.  The next stop was Marquette University Campus with a visit to the St. Joan of Arc Chapel.  Since the Marquette Campus is only two blocks away from my office, I invited the group to stop at my office for lunch.

It was near 12:45 PM when the travelers arrived at the WIC Clinic, an environment that is primarily made up of women and children, but which was now graced with the presence of nine wonderful young men who were grateful to come in out of the damp mist and humidity to relax with a hearty lunch.  I decided to incorporate this meal into the cooking challenge that my friend Christi and I are working on this summer. You may recall that Christi and I have agreed to invite priests and seminarians to our homes to prepare Italian meals for them using recipes found in From A Rectory Kitchen which was written by Fr. Matthew Mauriello and Franca Bosio Bertoli. You can read my previous post on this subject here and can order your own copy of the cookbook here.


I couldn't find any sandwich recipes in the cookbook, or any other entrees that would be easy for me to prepare at home and then take to work with me in the morning, so I made an Italian sub sandwich from a recipe I found online.  I prepared the Insalata Caprese (Caprese Salad) from the cookbook but used grape tomatoes and fresh mozzarella balls, thinking it might be easier to eat on the way, instead of the sliced tomatoes and cheese as called for in the recipe.  The meal was rounded out with garlic Sun Chips and fresh grapes, lemonade and water.  For dessert I prepared the Biscotti Zia Giuseppina (Aunt Josephine's Cookies) recipe and chose the option of scooping balls of dough instead of forming logs of biscotti.  When preparing the cookies I found that I was out of vanilla extract at home so I substituted lemon extract.  The recipe had called for lemon juice in the frosting but I replaced that with water to keep the cookies from being too tart. (The recipe is below.)

Domenick, one of the seminarians, commented that the Calabrese Salad reminded him of the time that he spent studying in Rome, and another young man, Joe, mentioned that the cookies brought back fond memories for him of an old family recipe that he used to love.  The lunchtime conversation consisted of highlights from the morning walk and comments about how alive the Catholic Church is in the Milwaukee community.

I  asked Fr. Luke if he would bless my office before they left and he gladly obliged.  He offered a prayer asking for God's holiness to shower down upon me and all of the clients that I serve and asking that the devil  be cast out forever in this now sacred space leaving me in a work environment filled only with the aura of God's holy presence.

After Fr. Luke and the seminarians and discerners were well fed and rested they resumed their journey.  As they walked along the busy downtown Wisconsin Avenue, they handed out peanut butter and jelly sandwiches to some homeless people and made their way to the Schoenstatt Shrine on 50th and Wisconsin Ave. for afternoon prayer.  They had hoped to reach Christ King Parish in Wauwatosa around dinner time and then arrive at their first overnight destination, St. Mary's Visitation Parish in Elm Grove by nightfall.

Tomorrow morning the pilgrimage will continue as the men walk toward St. Charles Parish in Hartland where Fr. Luke's brother, Fr. Jacob Strand, is working this summer, and then they will spend the night there.  The final destination, The Basilica of St. Mary, Help of Christians at Holy Hill is in sight for Saturday.  Please hold these pilgrims in your prayers as they journey to spread the Gospel message throughout the Archdiocese of Milwaukee.


 

 Biscotti Zia Giuseppina 

Ingredients:

1 C. shortening
1-1/4 c. sugar
6 eggs
2 T. vanilla extract
3 cups flour
2 T. baking powder

Mix shortening and sugar until creamy.  Add eggs and extract and mix well.  In a separate bowl, mix flour and baking powder together.  Gradually add to the egg mixture, incorporating well.  Place on two lightly greased cookie sheets with a spoon, forming a total of four logs.  Bake in a preheated, 350 degree oven for 20 minutes.  Cool for 5 minutes, slice diagonally, place on cookie sheets and return to oven until both sides are lightly toasted.  You can also cool the baked logs completely, thena spread the lemon icing, found below, on them, and slice.  Do not return them to the oven to toast.

Note:  For individual cookies, this batter can also be placed by the tablespoon on the cookie sheets before baking.  Then, after they are baked and cooled, they can be iced with the following:

Lemon Icing:

Using 1-1/2 cups confectionary sugar:  for each 1/2 cup of sugar, mix in 2 tsp. fresh lemon juice.  You can also substitute Anisette in place of the lemon juice.  Mix to a smooth but not runny consistency.  Add more sugar or more juice a bit at a time if needed to get a spreadable consistency.  You can decorate with colored sugar or rainbow sprinkles.

Serves 12 or more.

Of Holy Ground, Holy Hours and Holy Men

"But the seed sown on rich soil is the one who hears the word and understands it, who indeed bears fruit and yields a hundred or sixty or thirty fold.” from Matthew 13:1-23














After hearing the above Gospel reading at Mass, my son Joe questioned me: "Mom, what kind of soil are you?" We all want to be the rich soil, don't we, because we know that it's the "right" kind of soil, the one that will yield the most holiness in our hearts. But sadly, somehow, I don't think I'm there yet, and maybe I need more composting in my heart to enrich my soil. I had to honestly answer that question by saying that right now in the present moment the garden of my life is growing in the rocky soil, for I am always quick to hear the word of God and impulsively and joyfully accept it and believe that now I will finally live as a loving and faithful child of God, that my faith is rich and deep and strong. But along comes a storm or two, and maybe a drought in between, and before you know it, I'm withered and complaining, barely hanging on to my faith. I need some type of continual sustenance to change my rocky soil into the rich and fertile holy ground of deep and lasting faith.

Yet it wasn't too long after I answered that question when I felt the sweet consolations of God despite the sweltering heat of summer and felt that maybe through the prayers offered today at Roses for Our Lady's monthly Holy Hour for vocations at St. Francis de Sales Seminary, that my soil was perhaps becoming just a little richer and more prosperous. The chapel was filled with over sixty people praying fervently for an increase in vocations for the Archdiocese of Milwaukee. We were blessed with the presence of newly ordained Fr. Kevin McManaman and his parents, too! I could feel the love of God permeating throughout the chapel, pouring out from His presence in the Holy Eucharist and filling the air with the joy of both answered prayer and prayers yet to be answered.

In the Holy Ground of the Seminary the soil is always rich and moist with prayer and I felt in my heart that God was drawing the roots of those prayers deep into the earth where they would be strengthened and sustained and result in the sweet fruit of many holy and happy vocations to the priesthood and religious life. Holy ground, fertilized by holy hours of prayer, resulting in holy men. How rich!!!

What kind of soil are you?

Get Out of the Boat

On Pentecost Sunday at St. Francis de Sales Seminary, Roses for Our Lady held their monthly Holy Hour for Vocations. This particular Holy Hour was unlike any of the others, for we joyously celebrated and honored out spiritual director, Fr. Donald Hying, the Rector of St. Francis de Sales Seminary, who was recently made auxiliary Bishop of Milwaukee. In my spoken tribute to him, I shared this quote from one of his scripture reflections that he writes for the Milwaukee Catholic Herald; this one was from Pentecost 2009. This quote is an Imprisoned in my Bones repost from May 2009-the very early days of this blog-but definitely worthy of repeating, and definitely prophetic for Fr. Don who is now truly stepping into the deep and giving his life over to the Holy Spirit in a new and wondrous way.

"When we, like the saints, set the sail of our life to the mighty wind of the Holy Spirit, we will find ourselves doing things that we could never have imagined, witnessing to Christ in ways that seemed beyond our abilities and engaged in works of evangelization, charity and service that seemed impossible. One thing is certain. When we give our lives over to the Holy Spirit, nothing will ever be safe or dull again. We will find ourselves blown out to the deep water and then Christ will bid us to get out of the boat." Bishop-elect Donald J. Hying

Guest Post on the Papal Visit in the UK

My young English friend, John H., the founder of "A Vocation to be a Priest" has gathered his thoughts about the recent visit of Pope Benedict XVI to Great Britain and kindly shares them here...












During and after the visit of Pope Benedict to Britain, I am so proud to be a Catholic, but especially an English Catholic! There has been a Christian presence in these isles for 1500 years and our land has probably produced more saints and martyrs than any other country on earth. At long last I know what Blessed John Henry Newman understood when he wrote "I am a link in a chain".

Pope Benedict made a State visit to the UK rather than a pastoral visit - that means he was invited by Queen Elizabeth and Her Government. While I was only able to be physically present at one event (Hyde Park in London), I followed every single event on BBC TV which was truly outstanding. The warmth of welcome by the Queen was commented by all, and the Holy Father managed to win many hearts and souls by his humility and warmth and by his message. He addressed many political leaders in Westminster Hall (including four former Prime Ministers) and told them to be aware of rampant secularism which denies the voice of the Church and the Gospel in the affairs of State. This was especially significant because Westminster Hall was the place where St Thomas More was tried for putting his conscience before Government.

Talking about secularism - it was a washout - a total and abject failure. The protests against the Holy Father amounted to a pathetic 5000. At the same time 240,000 people lined the streets of London to greet him, wave flags, while 80,000 joined the Vigil in Hyde Park. This was outstanding - in the middle of a great and huge city, there was total silence as we adored Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament. Even the skeptical secular press was won round, who had predicted that the Papal visit would be a disaster, with nobody turning out.

The Holy Father had a punishing schedule, which included a visit to a retirement home, and a meeting with victims of clerical abuse. But for me, he won the hearts of everyone in his interaction with young people - they simply loved him! He told us that we were created for love and that is where we should seek our vocation.

It is reported by our Bishops that the visit was highly successful - the Pope has encouraged us, but he has been amazed at the vibrancy of Catholics in the UK.

You may know that we have a special link to the USA - the miracle from Blessed Cardinal John Henry Newman was via a Deacon in Boston.

As our Bishops have indicated - we now need to think about keeping alive the momentum of the Papal visit.

Close to Heaven

This past week, the Archdiocese of Milwaukee played host to the National Conference of Diocesan Vocation Directors (NCDVD). It was a great honor to have the opportunity to spend several hours volunteering at this event, working at the registration table. Did I say "working"? That can't be the right word, for truly, I can't remember ever having so much fun at a volunteer effort!

Every single priest who came to the desk to register had a beautiful smile and a few friendly words to offer, even the priest whose luggage was lost by the airline. It was clear to me that these Vocation Directors enjoyed their priesthood immensely and I imagine with pleasant dispositions like the ones I noticed, the priest shortage won't last much longer! Who wouldn't be drawn to the priesthood after meeting with a kind and friendly Vocation Director!

Whenever my family and I go on vacation, and people ask us where we are from, we are greeted with an uncomfortable silence when we tell them the name of our suburb. My son, Joe, calls our hometown a conversation killer. On Saturday, I was honored to meet a lovely woman who was helping to host the Conference. When I asked her where she was from and she answered "Indiana," I immediately thought of Joe's clever remark as I struggled to think of a way to carry the conversation beyond her home state. Gratefully, I remembered that one of my very favorite bloggers is a brilliant writer from Indiana, and grasping at what I thought was a straw, I mentioned her name. Well, wouldn't you know it, but my new acquaintance happened to be a personal friend of the blogger I mentioned, and she immediately called Betty Duffy on her cell phone. I had a bit of celebrity fever as I heard Betty on the other line mentioning that she had heard of my humble blog! What a small world it really is!

When I returned to the conference for a few more hours on Wednesday, I was in good company with my dear friend Anne (yep-two Anne's working side by side-how confusing is that?) and Susi, my sweet friend from the Vocations Office at our local Seminary. It was a joyful morning and the work was light, so Anne and I were able to venture among the various tables set up for display where I was surprised to find one of my all-time favorite priests and fellow blogger, Fr. Jim Kubicki manning the Apostleship of Prayer table! We even had time to sit in on a session about how to talk to parents whose children are considering the priesthood. As both Anne and I have sons who are discerning, this was a topic of great interest to us!

But perhaps best of all, we ended our day at Mass, one of the most beautiful and meaningful Masses that I have ever participated in! Truly it brought to mind Scott Hahn's "The Lamb's Supper" that clearly portrays the Mass as a reflection of heaven. I had never felt so close to heaven as I did at that Mass. As the room full of approximately 200 priests were finishing praying the rosary before Mass, they all stood and chanted "Regina Coeli". I have goosebumps just remembering the sight of so many men in white vestments looking like angels and the sound of their deep voices chanting this ageless prayer to our Beautiful Mother on the Occasion of "Our Lady of Sorrows." I pray that Mary's spirits were lifted up at this glorious sight and her sorrow was replaced with joy.

The homilist was Bishop Robert Morneau the auxiliary Bishop from Green Bay. His beautiful homily on the Angelus was peppered with poetry, in fact, at moments I wondered whether I at Mass or a poetry reading! One of the beautiful poems he recited was the Sancta Maria by Edgar Allen Poe. I was surprised to learn that the great E.A. Poe wrote such beautiful words; I had thought that he only specialized in the macabre.

Sancta Maria by Edgar Allen Poe

Sancta Maria! turn thine eyes -
Upon the sinner's sacrifice,
Of fervent prayer and humble love,
From thy holy throne above.

At morn - at noon - at twilight dim -
Maria! thou hast heard my hymn!
In joy and woe - in good and ill -
Mother of God, be with me still!

When the Hours flew brightly by,
And not a cloud obscured the sky,
My soul, lest it should truant be,
Thy grace did guide to thine and thee;

Now, when storms of Fate o'ercast
Darkly my Present and my Past,
Let my Future radiant shine
With sweet hopes of thee and thine!

The wonderful day was complete with a Thai luncheon with the girls (Susi and Anne) and long conversation, which left me racing to get to school in time to pick up the kids. Before my husband had left for work that morning, he offered to pick up our children from school for me (Wednesday is usually my turn because I am off of work on that day.) He said, "I will be happy to do it for you so that you don't have to hurry back, just in case you are enjoying yourself so much that you just can't break away." I felt that his offer was one of the most romantic things he had ever said to me. He truly understands my deep love for the Church and everything related to it and knew before I even left the house that I would have a wonderful day at the Conference.

But, I declined his offer, as I enjoy greeting my children at the end of the day and miss being able to do that on a regular basis because I work late. And I admit that even though the day at the Vocation Conference was great, there is nothing in the world like the feeling of seeing those sweet smiling faces of my two youngest children as they walk out of the school building and into my arms at the end of the day.

Starting the Day with Sunshine

I can't think of a better way to start the day than by attending daily Mass. Receiving the precious Body and Blood of my Lord and carrying Him within me marks my day as Sacred and Holy. There are very few things that could improve upon this blessed beginning, and lately I have been graced to witness and participate in a tremendous improvement that lifts my spirits sky high.

My eleven-year-old son, Jack, has volunteered to serve at the 7 AM Mass every Wednesday during the summer months. Usually, one of our elderly parishioners serves at the daily Mass, so it is a real treat to see a sweet boy at the altar next to Father. In fact, it is such a treat, that one of our elderly parishioners, Mrs. A, who usually attends daily Mass every day except Wednesday, has begun to come on Wednesdays as well, just for the joy of watching Jack serve. She recently sent me an email to praise Jack and his beautiful smile that never ends the entire time he is serving. Mrs. A says that she greatly admires Jack's sincerity as he assists the priest during Holy Mass.

As if watching Jack serve at Mass isn't joyful enough, our newly ordained transitional Deacon Christopher Klusman has also been assisting at some of the daily Masses. Like Jack, he has a smile that never ends. Listening to him proclaim the Gospel and preach a homily is like watching a living miracle each time he opens his mouth, as the fact that Christopher is deaf would hardly be noticeable to one who wasn't in the know.

This morning, my fourteen-year-old son, Joe, attended Mass with me. Before you jump to too many conclusions thinking what a wonderful and holy teen he is for attending daily Mass when he could be sleeping in as most teens do in the summertime, you should know that the only reason he came along was because he had a basketball camp at eight o'clock and if he wanted a ride there, he had to come to daily Mass with me first. (But secretly, I do believe a wonderful and holy teen is alive in his spirit just waiting to be released, no matter how hard he may try to disguise it!)

As Mass was beginning, Joe leaned over to me and whispered, "Mom, I think we're all going to be blind by the end of this Mass." When I questioned him on this theory, his response was that the brightness of Jack's and Deacon Christopher's never ending smiles would light up the church so much that we would all be covering our eyes as if we were standing out in the bright sunshine! And truly, he was right, because it is impossible to watch those two holy young men without smiling as well. By the time Mass was over, we might not have been blind, but everyone in our church was certainly smiling!

Please keep Jack in your prayers as he continues to serve at Wednesday Masses and weekend Masses and discerns whether or not God is calling him to the priesthood. Please pray for Deacon Christopher as well, as he finishes his last year in the Seminary in preparation for ordination to the priesthood next May.

Discernment

It's been a long time. My son John, who so enthusiastically began a blog one year ago, had stopped posting last March. Life is busy for a teen. But this week he has put something up about his recent trip to the Seminary Summer Camp, and it is very impressive. I encourage you to check it out! The annual camp outing for middle school and high school boys never fails to light a fire in John's heart, and that makes me very happy. Feel free to visit his blog, Writings of a boy discerning God's call, to read his latest posting, as well as the website in which he takes part, A Vocation to be a Priest. And please, keep all of the young boys and men who are considering vocations to the priesthood in your prayers!

Seminary Summer Camp

It’s time once again for Seminary Summer Camp. This year three of my sons with be spending a few days and nights at the Seminary of St. Francis de Sales to pray and play with other boys and to get a feel for daily life at the Seminary in an effort to help them discern whether or not God may be calling them to a priestly vocation. My son Jack is participating in the camp for Junior High boys in the early part of the week, and John and Justin will spend the latter part of the week at the camp for High School boys. John has participated in the camps for the past two years and enjoyed it so much that Justin and Jack thought that they might like it as well and decided to participate this year.

This is Jack’s first time away from home with the exception of few sleepovers with friends. He and his little sister Mary are very close. After I had left Jack at the Seminary and returned home, Mary started to cry profusely. “I miss Jacky!” she cried, and the tears just fell and fell. I suggested that she get her pet guinea pig, Benny, and play with him for a while until she felt better. I promised her that Jack was probably missing her just as much, but he would only be gone for two nights and the time would go fast. Still, when bedtime came around, she decided to sleep in Jack’s bed instead of her own so that she would feel close to him.

At 11:00, several hours after I had gone to bed, I heard the phone faintly ringing and I heard my husband ask, “What’s wrong? Do you want to talk to Mom?” It was Jack. He was crying and said he wanted to come home. Without pressing him further, I told him that I would be there within thirty minutes. Paul asked our son Joe to go along with me, since he was still up and I was grateful for the company on the long drive.

When we reached the Seminary, we found Jack and a chaperone standing in the doorway, waiting for me. Homesick. Jack had his bag packed and was ready to return to family and house full of the comfort of the known. Susi, the chaperone, said that Jack was welcome to come back the next day for Morning Prayer followed by Mass and breakfast with the Archbishop, and then a day filled with games, sports, work and prayer. She also mentioned that Jack had signed up to serve at Tuesday morning’s Mass, so she was really hoping that he would be there for that.

I knew that serving at Mass was something that Jack would not want to miss. Ever since he was trained as an acolyte earlier this year, assisting at Mass has been one of his favorite things to do. In fact, one of our sweet, elderly parishioners has been serving at the daily Mass three days a week. It’s getting to be a bit much for her, and she asked if one of my boys might take one day a week during the summer months. That night at dinner, I mentioned this to the boys and asked if any of them might like to help sweet Mrs. B out. Joe said he prefers to sleep late in the summer months. John and Justin who have both served at the daily Mass in the past, complained that serving at daily Mass is much harder than at Sunday Mass as the daily server is required to set up the altar and has more responsibilities. Jack piped up that he would like to take a weekly Mass to relieve Mrs. B from some of her work. Both John and Justin told Jack that he couldn’t handle it. In their wiser big brother ways, they told Jack that if they found it to be too hard, Jack certainly would not be able to manage it. But Jack firmly insisted that he wanted to serve and he would do just fine. Sure enough, that smart little boy took notes when Mrs. B trained him and he is confidently doing just fine serving at the Morning Mass. It is a treat to watch him grinning that huge smile of his the entire time he serves. And his delight is not lost on the elderly parishioners who are regulars at the morning Mass; his joy spreads to their hearts as well leaving everyone with a warm and loving feeling as morning Mass is over. I was certain that he would want to be there on Tuesday for the honor of serving at the Seminary.

As Jack and I climbed into the van and drove down the Seminary’s long tree-lined drive and back home, Joe asked Jack what it was that upset him so much that he didn’t want to stay at the Seminary.

“Well,” Jack replied, “during Benediction I started to miss my family and it made me sad.” Fr. Peter asked me why I was crying and when I told him, he said that he knows what that’s like to miss somebody that you love. And Susi told Jack about how much she misses her cat when she is away from him. Still, their words were not able to offer him the comfort of a night at home. He said he definitely wanted to go back in the morning for Mass and to spend the day, but he wasn’t sure that he would want to stay overnight the following night, either.

When we got home, exhausted Jack found Mary sleeping soundly in his bed, so he curled up on the floor next to his bed with a pillow and a few blankets and instantly drifted off to sleep. I thought of how much Mary had missed Jack, and here he was, right beside her and she didn’t even know it. Isn’t that just like God? When we really feel lonely for Him and need Him the most, He is right there beside us but we rarely realize it. And maybe, when we miss the people we love the most, they are also right beside us in spirit, missing us as just as much as we miss them. I prayed that Mary would feel comforted by Jack’s presence in her sleep, even if she wasn’t aware of how close he was to her.

Early the next morning, I woke Jack and we returned to the Seminary, while Mary continued to slumber in his bed. When we arrived in the chapel, I was feeling a bit intimidated and uncomfortable. I wondered if the other kids would look down on him for having left and if the staff were worried that he wasn’t quite ready for this experience.

My worries were soon allayed as Deacon Kevin greeted me and said “I heard you had a rough night last night. Thanks for bringing Jack back today!” I realized that this warm and welcoming group would do their best to make Jack feel as if the Seminary were his home away from home. I stayed for Morning Prayer and Mass and was so grateful to be part of such an intimate group in the Seminary Chapel. There were 21 boys staying at the camp, three Seminarians who were helping, Susi, the Rector and his assistant, the Vocations Director and his assistant, and the Archbishop, who said Mass. For me it was a real pleasure to be at that very special morning Mass, and as I quickly whispered goodbye to Jack after Mass, he smiled and said, “I think I’ll stay all night tonight,” and I left for work, tired, but joyful and confident that Jack would have a wonderful experience for the remainder of his time at Seminary Summer Camp.

Elisabeth Leseur

Every once in a while, the Holy Spirit slips a book into my hands and it has such a deep influence on me, that my life becomes changed for the better for having read it. Several years ago I purchased a wonderful book by Gina Loehr called “Real Women, Real Saints.” It was the composite of many wonderful women who were each called upon to draw the world closer to God in their own unique ways. A few weeks ago, I was praying to learn God’s will for me in my vocation as wife and mother and to show me how to draw my family ever closer to God and to deep devotion towards him, when I remembered reading about Elisabeth Leseur in Gina’s book.

Elisabeth Leseur was a Frenchwoman who lived from 1866-1914. She was a devout Catholic who was married to an atheist. Her husband and his atheistic friends would tease and criticize Elisabeth for her faith. She decided that she would not antagonize them, but rather, kept her faith inside and released it into a journal. She offered up all of the sufferings that she endured, both from the torment of her husband with whom she was deeply in love, and from her many physical sufferings that resulted in her death from breast cancer, in a pact with God. The gist of the pact was that her sufferings would bring about a change in her husband so that he would return to Catholicism and become a priest upon her death. Her husband, Felix, read her diary after she died, and he did indeed, convert and become a priest. Elisabeth Leseur’s cause for canonization continues to be investigated today.

Her journal, “My Spirit Rejoices”, was published by Felix. In it, I found many quotes that caused my own spirit to rejoice. In this Catholic laywoman, I found a kindred spirit who could reinforce my need to take all things to God and to maintain a joyful presence for my family and the world around me. What follows are some of the quotes from her journal that most moved my heart. It is my prayer that they will move your heart as well!

Elisabeth Leseur Quotes from My Spirit Rejoices

“My present trial seems to me a somewhat painful one, and I have the humiliation of knowing how badly I bore it at first. I now want to accept and to carry this little cross joyfully, to carry it silently, with a smile in my heart and on my lips, in union with the Cross of Christ. My God, blessed be Thou; accept from me each day the embarrassment, inconvenience, and pain this misery causes me. May it become a prayer and an act of reparation."

“A few moments of meditation and recollection each morning in the presence of God transforms and perfumes the whole day, like flowers cast about when night comes, whose fragrance at dawn anoints everything they have touched.”

“It is a difficult task, a heroic effort, to bring forth the thought that is in us, but we must do it, breaking our souls as we might break a sacred vase so that others may breathe the divine perfume.”

“Silence is sometimes an act of energy, and smiling, too.”

“When blood no longer flows from an open wound, to the indifferent eye it seems that healing is near. Nothing could be more wrong; the wound that no longer bleeds is the one that will never heal.”

“What good is confiding one’s pains, miseries and regrets to those to whom one cannot say at the end, “pray for me”?

In the book "Selected Writings of Elizabeth Leseur" edited and translated by Janet Ruffing, there are a collection of letters written to friends and family members. In a letter to her Goddaughter as she was preparing for her First Communion, Elisabeth says:

“With the Church, I believe that the whole structure of our moral, national and social life is based on the family, and I am convinced that everything done for the family enhances the greatness and strength of peoples and societies; on the other hand, they are irretrievably destroyed as soon as the family, the cornerstone of the structure, is attacked.
Thus, you will do all you can to strengthen in every way respect for family life. Later on, when you have your own family, you will make your home a warm and lively center of influence, and you will be a guiding spirit for those who live in the light that you spread. You will be a friend and companion to your husband, and a guide and model of moral strength to your children. You will possess that precious treasure…a serenity and peace of mind that nothing can destroy, neither trials nor losses, since God is their source, and God gives them sometimes in proportion to our own sufferings.
This is one of those mysterious compensations, unknown on a purely human level but known only to God who alone reveals the secret.
You will develop the habit through daily effort and the help of God’s grace to “possess your soul in peace,” to be gentle and lovingly composed in your attitude toward events, people and life itself. Sometimes managing to smile requires true heroism; may your smile, whether thoughtful or joyful, always do good.”

Elisabeth Leseur, a married lay woman, is a perfect role model for all married women who strive to serve their husbands and families through silent service and non-stop prayer.