Beguine Spirituality

"Anyone who has waded through Love's turbulent waters, now feeling hunger and now satiety is untouched by the seasons of withering or blooming.  For in the deepest and most dangerous waters, on the highest peaks, Love is always the same."  ~Hadewijch of Brabant

"I am poured out like water, and all my bones are out of joint; my heart is like wax."~ Psalm 22:14

A drawing of a Beguine from Des dodes dantz, printed in Lübeck in 1489. (source)

At the most recent meeting of the de Chantal Society at Saint Francis de Sales Seminary in Milwaukee we were treated to a topic on which I had never had any previous knowledge but found fascinating, Beguine Spirituality.  The speaker was Fr. Dennis Saran from Christ King Parish in Wauwatosa. After a period of silent adoration Fr. Dennis began by telling the women gathered that we are very much like an ancient community of women called The Beguines.  He told us that we occupy our time with caring for our families and friends, with serving the sick and the poor and we live very ordinary lives devoted to God.  The Beguines, he said, were ordinary lay women, as well.  They lived very normal lives and occupied their time with caring for the sick and the poor and yet they were deeply connected to God despite not being part of a religious community.

"The Beguine movement was a lay woman's movement that arose in the early 13th century.  The Beguines did not follow any established rule, but lived lives of apostolic poverty and chastity, doing works of charity among the poor and sick.

This style of life led to a spirituality that was both in and out of this world, using rich and captivating imagery.  They tried to capture the longing and love for the Other through their use of everyday experiences."

In the history of the Church there have been three types of spirituality.  The first is Monastic, the kind that Church fathers said could only exist in the desert with proper time for prayer and contemplation. You could only get to God if your prayer was constant.  The requirements promised union with God but only after years of constant devotion.  The common person couldn't approach this difficult lifelong commitment.

The second type of spirituality is Scholastic Theology.  This is the use of reason and philosophy to find your way to God.  St. Thomas Aquinas' Summa Theologica is an example of this.  We use reasons and proofs to experience God.  Until the 1950's this was the primary theological source for anyone who wasn't monastic.  The Baltimore Catechism was a product of this, as well as the theology of Fulton Sheen.  Scholastic Theology was popular in a masculine dominated Church as it was a problem-solving approach.  A personal relationship with God was not considered.

Vernacular or Common Spirituality is the third type of spirituality which accents personal relationship with God through our daily lives and sees nature as a sign of God's love for us.  The fact that we can learn compassion and good acts is feminine in its foundation and is championed by most female mystics.  It flourished in homes among spouses and in churches.  Here we seek union with God through private piety.

Vernacular Spirituality offered the possibility of achieving spiritual union with God to anyone in any walk of life.  This spirituality was supported by local clergy who saw a need for spirituality for the common people.  This male-dominated society where women were to be obedient was now Christ dominated.  A popular example of this was championed by St. Bernard of Clairvaux in the 12th century who added another dimension to our view and image of God.  Here God was seen not as a King or a Judge but now a Lover and a Bridegroom.  Sin was felt to be a betrayal.  We are the Lover and Jesus is the Bride.  You prepare yourself for the kiss of Christ.  This nuptial mysticism was foreign to the clergy of that time.

At the same time this idea of God as a Lover and a Bridegroom was expressed in the Beguine Movement.  Some people have thought of the Beguines as heretical.  It was the first European women's lay religious movement incorporating a life of prayer to draw closer to Christ.  Women could be married, widowed or single.  No vows were taken with the exception of an informal vow to remain celibate but this had no obligation attached to it.

The Beguines originated in Germany and France.  The women lived lives of charity and poverty and included both private prayer and corporate worship.  Several women had a personal, mystical union with Christ.  They did not write about God in an abstract sense; it was personal and much of the writing was romantic.  Many of these mystics are totally unknown to us.

"God leads his chosen people along strange paths." 
~Mechtild of Magdeburg

Mechtild of Magdeburg

One of these mystics whose words have been passed down through the centuries was Mechtild of Magdeburg who wrote the book "The Flowing Light of the Godhead" on courtly love with common sense.  Her book identifies daily tasks that can be used to serve God.  She talks about God walking with us in our daily lives.  It is often through suffering that love is defined and deepened.  Our greatest joy in heaven will be the love of God's will.  Here we will be one with God and will delight in his will.  Everything you do can be transferred into joy.  Suffering elevates you to God. We wear everyday work clothes when we're well but wear brides clothes when we are ill because our illness unites us to God.

Our longing for God is a hunger, thirst, ache, excitement.  We are all made for union with God.  Our nature is to be one with God.  Suffering and love are intimately tied together as seen in childbirth and parenting.    We are ever-longing in soul and ever-suffering in body.  Small sins harm perfection. What often impedes our spiritual life is that we pay no attention to our small sins.  But little daily efforts reveal the joys and love of God.  We aren't asked to become cloistered but to do small things with joy as echoed by St. Therese of Lisieux and St. Teresa of Calcutta.  Even small acts of compassion cleanse our souls.

Each day we should say, "Jesus, my love, what do you want of me today?" and then say it the next day and the day after that.

For more details about Mechtild of Magdeburg with links to some of her beautiful poetry visit this website.

source

Parade of Magi

The Nativity Scene at Old St. Mary in Milwaukee

It felt like a long time since I'd had some quiet, alone time with the Lord, so I eagerly agreed to stay after Mass and wait for my daughter while she attended her Sunday school class as the rest of my family headed home.  I found a vacant back pew and waited for the last of the Sunday worshipers to make their way out of church.  A peaceful bliss ensued as I sat alone in the darkened church with Jesus for my only company.

But soon I noticed a young girl who quietly entered and sat in the back pew across the aisle from me. It wasn't long after that when the sacristan came in to prepare for the next Mass.  After he left, a young mother came in with her baby, softly cooing and they walked to the front of church to admire the Nativity scene.  Then three young men came in and walked around the perimeter of the church, quietly whispering and viewing the beauties of the church.  Next, a Sunday school teacher came in with her young students.  They sat in the front row of church in silent adoration.  Then the sounds of the choir beginning practice in the balcony above filled with space with joyful noise.  Before I  knew it my daughter was tapping my shoulder, telling me her class was over and we left church for the journey home.

I was struck by the steady number of visitors who came and went during the short space of time between Masses on the Feast of the Epiphany.  We were all Magi, looking for the Babe, hoping to give him the gift of our love, however briefly that might have proved to be.  The sight of so many people coming and going enhanced my own prayer and brought me to want to adore the Infant King ever more deeply.  I'm certain we were all made the better for drawing close to Him and are forever changed by His Love.

My favorite picture of a long-ago Ephiphany celebration in the Bender household.  The children are holding star-covered boxes filled with chocolate stars, starburst candies and starlight mints.  We had followed the star throughout our house looking for the Infant Jesus and when we found him we celebrated with King Cake.

St. John the Evangelist Parish and the Shrine of the Passion of Christ in St. John, Indiana

Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane-Shrine of Christ's Passion

On the Eve of Pentecost, my family and I were blessed to go on a pilgrimage to  the Shrine of Christ's Passion in St. John, Indiana led by Bishop Donald Hying of Gary, Indiana and Fr. Anthony Jelinek of Marytown in Libertyville, Illinois.  The pilgrimage was sponsored by Michael Wick of The Institute on Religious Life.  We were all deeply moved by the experience, so much so that I thought about just titling this blog post "Wow!"

Although a trip out of town is always a fun occasion, a pilgrimage is not just any ordinary trip, but rather, it is meant to be difficult and to change us in some way, helping us to draw closer to the Lord, and so we were well-prepared to deal with any challenges that we might encounter, although, admittedly, we encountered very few.

Our first stop was at St. John the Evangelist Church in St. John, Indiana.  The presider at Mass was our dear friend, Bishop Hying.  It was so good to pray with him, and in his moving homily about the power of Pentecost he shared one of my favorite quotes of his: "One thing is certain. When we give our lives over to the Holy Spirit, nothing will ever be safe or dull again. We will find ourselves blown out to the deep water and then Christ will bid us to get out of the boat." 

Following Mass, one of the parishioners gave us a tour of the church and shared the history of the parish with us.

St. John the Evangelist Parish Church in the diocese of Gary was originally built in 1837.  The original church, the first church in Northern Indiana, was made of logs and is still standing and is used today at a perpetual Eucharistic Adoration Chapel.  The chapel was only a few minutes away from the newer church so we took a few minutes on our way home at the end of the day to stop and pray in that beautiful chapel and were deeply moved to be with the Lord in such an historical treasure.

When the parish outgrew the log cabin, they had built a larger church, and then years later an even larger church right next door.  Now they have once again outgrown that third church but continue to use it for the daily and school Masses.  In 2008, they built this newest church which seats 10,000 people, the number of people who attended this past year's Good Friday service.  Our tour guide boasted that although the original debt for the cost of the building was well into the millions, most of the debt is already paid off.  The architect who designed the church is a parishioner of St. John the Evangelist Parish.  How special it must feel to worship in the building that you designed!

St. John the Evangelist Church as seen from the grounds of the Shrine of Christ's Passion.

A large statue of Our Lady, properly crowned for May.
The grounds of the Shrine of the Passion of Christ can be seen in the background.

A window in the front of the church displays scenes from the book of Revelation.

photo credit:  John Paul Bender

The two-sided tabernacle which opens from the back  is flanked by two angels on loan from a private collection in Rome.  The hand-carved gold leaf angels are over 300 years old.

The angels that surround the tabernacle on both sides represent the Liturgy of the Hours.
They were designed by the same architect that designed the church.
Photo Credit:  John Paul Bender

The Stations of the Cross are made of ceramic by Suzanne Young from Grand Rapids, Michigan.

She captured the expression on Our Lady's face so perfectly here...

...and here, as well.  You can feel her love and her sorrow.

The stained-glass Holy Spirit window mimics the one found at St. Peter's Basilica in the Vatican.

Although she's not yet been declared a saint, the church has a
stained glass window of Blessed Mother Teresa of Calcutta.

St. Pope John Paul has a window, as well.

The Blessed Mother with the infant Jesus were carved by the same artist who made the
statue of the Blessed Mother for St. John the Evangelist Cathedral in downtown Milwaukee.

Upon arriving at the Shrine of Christ's Passion, which is literally in the backyard of St. John the Evangelist Church, we were greeted by a giant, metallic statue of Our Lady of the Millenium, and, just before leaving, our pilgrimage group gathered around the statue to pray the rosary.

Our Lady of the New Millennium

The volunteers at the Shrine who guided us on our prayerful tour of the life-sized Stations of the Cross, were informative, friendly and helpful.  They also are already very fond of their new bishop which made all of us who were visiting from Milwaukee very proud.

As we walked the path from station to station, the path that was measured out to be the exact same distance that Christ had walked on his Way to Calvary, they spoke about nuances of the artwork and shared stories of how past pilgrims have been touched by the Stations of the Cross at the Shrine. Then they played an audio-recorded prayer for each station while hauntingly beautiful music played in the background.

Touch me not!  Our Resurrected Lord meets St. Mary Magdalene.

Fr. Jelinek lies prostrate at the crucifix and leads us in prayer.

The highlight of the Shrine visit were the reflections offered at each station by Fr. Jelinek.  In his rich Hungarian voice, he added relevance to each station regarding how we live our lives today.  He cautioned us against gossip, spoke about the importance of turning to the Blessed Mother whenever we are in need, reminded us of the importance of a good and frequent confession, mentioned that if we don't forgive ourselves it will be impossible for us to forgive others, at the eighth station pointed out that only women were present and mentioned that even today most church-goers are women, and then spoke about how important it is for men to have a deep and personal relationship with the Lord.  At each and every stop, Father stressed the need for prayer.  Fr. Jelinec spoke with conviction in a "fire and brimstone" manner, warning us to be on our guard at all times so that when our personal judgment arrives, we won't be one of the many who hear "I never knew you."

Fr. Jelinek shares the story of how Our Lady was a help to him while he was persecuted in Communist Hungary.

I'm planning a return pilgrimage to the Shrine of Christ's Passion with my sisters and nieces in late June.  I can hardly wait!  For another perspective on our pilgrimage, visit my son, John's blog here.

The World is Hungry

"The world is hungry for the Eucharist, adored and received! "
~Fr. Jim Kubicki, SJ

On September 9th, Roses for Our Lady sponsored a Eucharistic Rosary Procession during our monthly holy hour for vocations in honor of the Blessed Mother's birth.  Fr. Jim Kubicki, SJ, the national director of the Apostleship of Prayer, had the honor of carrying our Lord in the procession.  I posted this picture, taken by Eve Anna Urlakis, to Roses for Our Lady's facebook page and it has been shared 16 times including in locations across the world, which is incredible to me considering the fact that Roses for Our Lady is just a small, local group in the Milwaukee Archdiocese.

O Sacrament most holy, O Sacrament divine, all praise and all thanksgiving be every moment thine!  Praised be Jesus Christ in the most holy Sacrament of the altar, now and forever.  Amen.

Jessica Powers

Sr. Miriam of the Holy Spirit

Not too long ago, Magnifacat Magazine published a beautiful poem by Jessica Powers, a name that was completely unknown to me.  I lingered over the final words of that poem, The Garments of God, which read:

"here in the dark I clutch the garments of God."

And I clutched those words throughout the day, pondering about who the author of such wonder could be.  I didn't have to think on it for long, as within a day I found a blog post by Easter from Hawaii, and learned that she, too, was enamored by the poem penned by that unknown poetess.  But Easter did more than I did, she began to search in an effort to learn more about Jessica Powers and she found this wonderful website with a wealth of information about Jessica Powers, who spent most of her life as Sister Miriam of the Holy Spirit, a Carmelite nun living at the Carmel of the Mother of God in Pewaukee, Wisconsin.  I had the honor of praying at that very same convent  with my niece several years ago and had no idea that I was in the earthly home of so great a poet.  I wrote about that prayer experience here and after re-reading that post I'm going to have to make an effort to get back out to that convent for some one-on-one time with the Lord, and this time I will be praying for the intercession of a saintly poet!

After learning that Jessica Powers was the author of several volumes of poetry, I quickly put in a request at my favorite library, St. Francis de Sales Seminary's Salzmann Library, and was soon holding every book by or about this wonderful poet within my hands.  Jessica Powers was a close friend to Green Bay's Auxiliary Bishop Robert Morneau and several of her books of poetry were collected and edited by this local holy man.  You can read an article of his about her here.

One of the things that impresses me the most about Jessica Powers is that she has a great love for nature, specifically the wilds of Wisconsin.  I brought several of her poetry editions along with me when my family and I took a recent camping vacation to Devil's Lake State Park just south of her hometown of Mauston.  While sitting around the campfire, my husband suggested that we have a poetry reading, with my children, and he and I each taking a turn reading one of her poems aloud.  After each reading, everyone snapped their fingers, which is apparently the hip thing to do to show appreciation for the poem instead of clapping.  I was just so happy to introduce spiritual poetry to my family as willing participants that although I would have preferred silence in lieu of the snapping, I went along with the game anyway and found that it was most enjoyable.  If the Spirit inspires you, feel free to snap your fingers after reading the following poems by Jessica Powers, or simply absorb them in silence.

Doves (from:  The Lantern Burns)

A dove in the air,
A dove in the sea,
And a dove in your glance
When you look at me.

Feather of dusk,
Wings in the grain,
And a crumpled bird
In the wake of pain.

Everywhere doves
With their drifting wings;
In a dream, in a song
That a poet sings;

In the touch of death,
In the kiss of love,
And God Himself
As a snow-white dove.

The Seventh Station (from:  The Place of Splendor)

The corner is dark and nobody sees this station.
He falls again, and the picture has nothing new.
The air is musty, crowded under the choir loft,
And people pass with a hurried glance or two.

I think that it must have been true in ancient Juda
As it is true on this shaded chapel wall
That He Whose love had rooted itself in suffering
Would find the most uncomforting place to fall.

Take Your Only Son  (from:  The House at Rest)

None guessed our nearness to the land of vision,
not even our two companions to the mount.
That you bore wood and I, by grave decision,
fire and sword, they judged of small account.

Speech might leap wide to what were best unspoken
and so we plodded, silent, through the dust.
I turned my gaze lest the heart be twice broken
when innocence looked up to smile its trust.

O love far deeper than a lone begotten,
how grievingly I let your words be lost
when a shy question guessed I had forgotten
a thing so vital as the holocaust.

Hope may shout promise of reward unending
and faith buy bells to ring its gladness thrice,
but these do not preclude earth's tragic ending
and the heart shattered in its sacrifice.

Not beside Abram does my story set me.
I built the altar, laid the wood for flame.
I stayed my sword as long as duty let me,
and then alas, alas, no angel came.

Sanctuary Lamp

When the sanctuary lamp
of my soul grows dim
and my prayer feels dry
and hope seems slim

I drag through life
on little sleep
heavy with worry
my constant keep

For reasons uncertain
this trembling heart
fails to accept
the love You impart

Your wise and holy wisdom
Your will meant just for me
is cast out by sinful desires
they are all my mind can see

What I want is not what You want
nor can it ever be
for all my frantic grasping
will keep me far from Thee

But there's nothing to fear
for all is surely well
I've only to remain steadfast
and my spirit will swell

With joys and with love
from your beautiful source
Your most Sacred Heart
in the Eucharist, of course

So Jesus stay near me
no matter how hard
I push You away
Your will to discard

I sit before your tabernacle
Your holy house of life
please remove my lack of fervor
ease my relentless strife

O sanctuary lamp of my soul
forever burn bright and strong
reminding me of God's constant presence
deep within me all along

I Have Peace

disquiet overcomes
and irritation prevails
the pangs of pride
control me
taking over my peace

and He calls to me
bids me to come to Him
and I am drawn
to Eucharistic Adoration
falling on my knees before Him

praying for the peace
that comes from humility
I empty my soul
of all that torments
and release it to His love

arriving home
I see a rainbow in the clouds
His colorful covenant
of love for this unworthy
prideful creature

He called to me
He emptied me
He loves me

In the midst of my ugly pride
He gives me a rainbow of love
and I have peace
I have peace

All-Love, loving

I've been reading a wonderful book, A Prophet for the Priesthood: A Spiritual Biography of Fr. Gerald M.C. Fitzgerald by Fr. John Hardon, SJ. It's beyond amazing to read a book by one great and holy priest about another great and holy priest who devoted his life to praying for and helping all priests, but especially for those who struggled in their vocation. In today's world when we hear of one priest after another falling from grace, it's so hopeful to know that this isn't something new and that there is someone who cared enough to build a lasting religious order to combat the temptations and trials that beset the priesthood.

Fr. Fitzgerald was the founder of the Society of the Paraclete for priests and the Handmaids of the Precious Blood, an order of contemplative nuns who devote their lives to supporting and praying for priests. He worked tirelessly to promote Eucharistic Adoration of Jesus in the Most Blessed Sacrament. I found the following quote to be particularly poignant:

"Even if you had the happiest of human homes, even if you had the great sense of security, the love of the finest earthly husband and children, it would only be for a few years...The shadow of the cross lies over every life. It can't be otherwise because only by the cross can we be redeemed. And the cross is terribly hard unless we love the Corpus on it. The Blessed Sacrament is for us the Corpus on the Cross.

It is for us Mother and Father, and brother and sister, and Bridegroom and Bride. It's All. Here is all the tenderness of the Eternal Father. Here is the source of that little mysterious throbbing of your heart which means that you are living.

O Lord Jesus, like a child who only knows that the Blessed Sacrament is Jesus, teach us that which is the supreme wisdom of all the Catholic philosophies. St. Augustine was a lover. That is the secret of sanctity, to be a lover of God. Here in the Blessed Sacrament is everything. Here is All-Love, loving."

And this quote about desiring good will is very moving:

"Beg God to give you a good will. We recognize it in others, do we not? We are lost, we get nowhere unless there is good will. That is all that God has blessed on earth, is it not? He made that careful distinction and had His angels express it at the moment when heaven was radiant in its own generosity, when the night was filled with the music of the angel choirs. And what was it that they are proclaiming? Not peace on earth to everyone but only peace on earth to men of good will."

To learn more about Fr. Gerald Fitzgerald, a priest of very good will, visit the Handmaids of the Precious Blood.

Having Too Much Fun

"Spring is when you feel like whistling even with a shoe full of slush." Doug Larson




















In April my thoughts always turn to my dad as this was his birthday month. (Truthfully, my thoughts are frequently turned towards the memory of my dad no matter the month!) One of my favorite childhood memories was watching him sit down at the end of a long day, not at the kitchen table writing out checks to the missions with the polkas blaring as he usually did, but instead, sitting in the living room watching one of his two favorite television shows- All in the Family or Hogan's Heroes. He would never watch anything else. I can just picture him with his hand on the side of his face and tears rolling down his cheeks because he would be laughing so hard at the antics on those shows.

You could say that my dad was ahead of his time as far as sedentary activity was concerned. We were always restricted in our television viewing; we were never allowed to watch it during the day, that time was strictly for work or play and he himself abided by this rule. Today when I am at work, I am forever reminding young parents to limit the amount of time that they allow their children to watch TV and encourage them to provide plenty of opportunities for physical activity instead.

So there I was the other day, living in exact opposition to the advice I give, all cozied up on the sofa in front of the set wrapped in nostalgia as I happened to catch an All in the Family re-run on TV. In this particular episode, Mike and Gloria were expecting their first baby and they had invited Archie and Edith to spend Thanksgiving with them. Everyone was in an uproar (they were always in an uproar on that show) because Mike the "Meathead" atheist was adamant in his refusal to have the baby baptized and Archie was extremely upset about Mike's decision. The "Dingbat" Edith chimed in with a very interesting statement in support of Archie's request that his grandson be raised in the Christian faith. She said, "Children should go to church when they're little because when they're older they are having too much fun to be religious."

Her statement made me think that maybe "Dingbat" wasn't such a bad name for her after all. For even though I am no longer so young myself, I am having more fun now being "religious" than I ever did in the "fun" and reckless days of my youth! I can't fathom anything that is better or more pleasurable than silently kneeling in front of my Eucharistic Lord in adoration, or belting out one of my favorite hymns at Mass, or praising Him with my entire being in the glories of His nature. Watching my children finger their rosary beads as they pray is a great delight. Listening to someone who is hurting share their suffering and knowing that my presence and prayers give them comfort in some way brings me much joy. The sight of my family filling the pew at church is one of the greatest beauties I know. To abandon myself in the pages of a spiritual book brings peace and inspiration beyond my wildest imaginings, and perhaps, best of all, discovering a new friend whose faith is similar to my own gives me a thrill beyond compare!

Sure we have our troubles, our slushy shoes-there's never enough money, the aches and pains in our bodies constantly remind us of our fragile humanity, our sins may be forever before us glaring out for the world to see; but living with those troubles in the light of faith is far more enjoyable than living with those troubles in the darkness of doubt.

"Doubt is a pain too lonely to know that faith is his twin brother." Kahlil Gibran

So I will embrace my faith and live it to the hilt. I will enjoy every second of this precious life that God has chosen to bless me with and I will never know the pain of loneliness that comes from not being religious. I will retain a childlike spirit and go to church and for me that is fun! Can you hear me whistling with my shoe full of slush? It's spring!!!

Faith Becomes You

"Look to Him that you may be radiant with joy and your faces may not blush with shame."
Psalm 33:6










For Valentine's Day, my husband and I had a long overdue night out at the movies. Although we had received free movie vouchers months ago, we couldn't decide on a movie until I read the Deacon's Bench review of The Rite. My husband loves scary movies. I don't. When I was growing up my mom always told me not to watch movies about the devil because by doing so, you are allowing him access to your soul. Years ago, when Paul and I were still dating, he took me to a see a movie called The Prince of Darkness, despite my mother's warning. It truly was a good date movie, believe it or not, because I had my face buried in his chest the entire time while I prayed the Hail Mary over and over again! Nothing like fear to draw you close, is there?

Now, with the encouragement from the Deacon's words, I decided that I could handle this one and it would be a movie that both Paul and I would enjoy. As we passed the ticket taker at the theater he delighted in giving us the direction;"The Rite is on the left! Nice romantic movie choice for Valentine's Day!" :)

It was a good movie, it really made me appreciate my Catholic faith, but it freaked me out plenty as well! As we were leaving, I saw an usher from our parish and said "Makes me want to run right to church!" "I'll meet you there!" he replied. I wasn't the only one who felt the fear portrayed in that movie!

I haven't been able to stop thinking about The Rite all day today, and it has brought about an interesting discussion this evening between Paul and I. My favorite line from the movie was delivered by Anthony Hopkins' character to the young Seminarian in his charge near the very end. He said, "Faith becomes you." So I took those words to adoration tonight and held them before the Lord in prayer...

Faith Becomes You

When fear presses down and my thoughts turn to escape, I look to the Lord and hear Him say-
Faith Becomes You

When I'm misunderstood and others whisper behind me, I look to the Lord and hear Him say-
Faith Becomes You

When I forget who I am-a child of God, and behave in a sinful and scandalous manner, I look to the Lord and hear him say-Faith Becomes You

When stress and sorrows crowd around me everywhere I turn, I look to the Lord and hear Him say- Faith Becomes You

I sit before Him in His golden case recalling the words from a friend...

"Faith is resting in God's love, His presence and His provision."

And I become more like Him when I rest in His love, His presence and His provision.

Faith does become me. So, I carry the becoming of my faith in my heart as I leave His presence and when I am surrounded by fear, misunderstanding, sin, stress and sorrow, I will look to the Lord in faith and find that he is always present to me and I can rest...

I can rest.

Oh Lord, I waited long for this time with You. Thank You for the gift of Your restful presence. Thank You for the gift of my faith. Amen.

Calling Me Closer

Having just come from Tiffany's blog, Family at the Foot of the Cross, I find that I have been deeply moved by her story of a recent experience at Adoration where she witnessed a woman who was clearly in a deep love relationship with the Lord, and I feel that my whole perspective on my relationship with the Lord has been challenged.

Whenever I go to Adoration or attend a group Holy Hour or daily Mass, I always sit in the back (unless I'm the lector.) I guess it's my way of saying I'm not worthy to come closer and I also enjoy being able to see all of the other people who are there, drawing a feeling of loving community from them, realizing that we are all there to offer praise and worship to the Lord. I'd been in the habit of looking at all of the people gathered as one, and I always ask God to please hear all of our prayers, not simply my own.

But, maybe I've got it wrong-maybe I should be right in front, as close as I can get. Perhaps God is calling me to come closer in prayer and not let all of the other people distract me from Him. Maybe for the short time that I spend in worship at Church and at Adoration Chapels, He wants me all for Himself and wants me to feel His love as a gift for me alone. Could it be that through that hour of close and loving rest near His Eucharistic Heart, I will be strengthened to carry on with all of the responsibilities for which He has commissioned me?

O Lord, draw me close to you. Let me inside of Your Most Sacred Heart, where love and peace abound. Give me the courage and the strength to carry on Your will for me in this world of temptation and pain. Keep me forever within Your love. Amen.

Humble Love

Again...He holds my sins and failures before me...reminds me that all I need is humble love.

Why is it so hard to remember? Like a child with attention deficit disorder, His lessons go through me and disappear. I need reminders-and they always include pain.

A rebuke from my supervisor.

An argument with my son.

A little word of restraint from a friend.

I wince when I learn once again that this life is meant to include sorrow, that this journey to the perfection of heaven means that I am not perfect yet, but must continue to work towards that ideal.

And then He brings me to silence. Bowed before Him in adoration, watching the blood spill from His side, wanting so much to stop it, to cup it in my hands, to hold it forever...but it drips right through my fingers.

He wants me to stay small and to give my love to others over and over again, even when I grow weary and would rather not put any effort into loving. Like His blood that keeps on flowing, my love is meant to continuously be given to others, not pridefully kept to myself.

Humble love...grown in the silence that follows hurt pride and embarrassment...requiring restraint of tongue and abandonment of self...it's His gift to me; the one thing that I can hold on to forever, if I will only remember...

“At some ideas you stand perplexed, especially at the sight of human sins, uncertain whether to combat it by force or by humble love. Always decide, ‘I will combat it with humble love,’ If you make up your mind about that once and for all, you can conquer the whole world. Loving humility is a terrible force; it is the strongest of all things and there is nothing like it.” — Fyodor Dostoyevski

He Leads, They Follow

"Like a shepherd he feeds his flock; in his arms he gathers the lambs, Carrying them in his bosom, and leading the ewes with care." ~Isaiah 40:11









Today's readings are terribly comforting. I can just picture a pastoral hillside in the early spring morning, dew clinging to the green, mists clearing away in the rays of bright sun, and a beautiful, caring man with tender yet work-worn hands, leading his beloved sheep in the way in which they should go. And with unfailing trust, they follow, knowing that he will never lead them astray.

But, what is even more comforting to me than the imaginary visuals I picture, is the fact that I have seen this image several times in real life, very recently.

He leads~ I received an email from one of my very dearest friends. She and another friend of hers were wondering if I knew of some local hours of adoration. After some recent discussions, they had decided that spending silent time with the Lord was just the boost that their spiritual lives needed. Adoration is something quite new to them and they wanted to give it a try, so I gladly shared some local adoration schedules with her. A few days later, my friend called me to report that her friend couldn't wait and had already gone to be alone with Jesus for an hour, and was hooked! She couldn't wait to go back, and the two of them had a date chosen in the coming days when they would attend together. A blessing! ~They follow

He leads~ Last Sunday as my family and I walked into church for the 7:30 AM Mass, I saw the sweet young teen who has asked me to be her confirmation sponsor. She was all alone, sitting near the back of church. My heart skipped a beat of joy as I embraced her and told her how happy I was to see her there. After Mass, she was working at a table, signing people up for an upcoming blood drive. It's so thrilling to see young people in action, living their faith, without any prompting from the adults in their lives, simply doing what they know in their hearts to be right and true. ~They follow

He leads~ A young woman who had lost her oldest daughter in a tragic car accident a few years ago contacted me recently. Our lives had connected through the power of the Holy Spirit with a simple poem. Since the time of her daughter's funeral, we had become email and facebook buddies, and finally, last summer, I had the honor of meeting her in person and offering her what little comfort could be given to one who continues to suffer so. Hearing her voice on the phone delivering the message she couldn't wait to share with me, was like listening to the voice of an angel. She wanted me to know that she was working on getting her life back together. She was in the process of making plans to have her two little children baptized, and, along with them, she herself wants to be baptized. She will be joining my parish and following through with the plans that God has for her life. ~They follow

Thank You, Jesus, my gentle shepherd, for allowing me to play a small part in the spiritual lives of these women who are longing for you. Perhaps I am the bell quietly ringing to let them know of your presence, maybe I am the fence that holds them together so they can't stray too far from your loving gaze or, perhaps, I am simply the silent witness, praying that You will always hold them close. No matter how You choose to use me, Lord, I thank You. But, most of all, I thank You for desiring and loving all of your little ones, and especially for loving me, the littlest one of all. Amen.

"...it is not the will of your heavenly Father that one of these little ones be lost.” Matthew 18:14

O Come, Let Us Adore Him!

(Catholic Herald photo by Ernie Mastroianni)

Our family pediatrician is an amazing man. He always supports parents in their difficult job by giving good advice to his little patients at every visit, such as:

"Always eat your vegetables."
"Make sure you wear your helmet every time you ride your bike."
"Get an hour of fresh air and exercise every day."
"Obey your parents the first time they tell you to do something."
"Do your homework and your chores right away."
and for the teens-"No dating until you're thirty!"

It's great for our kids to hear those words of healthy living from figures of authority other than parents once in a while, so I have always been very grateful to Dr. Andrew Swietlik for being a wonderful doctor, but now, I am grateful to him for so much more!

Recently, Karen Mahoney, a gifted writer for the Milwaukee Catholic Herald, wrote a story about the 25th anniversary of the perpetual Adoration Chapel at St. Mary's Parish in Elm Grove, WI. The accompanying picture on the front page of the paper featured Dr. Swietlik with three of his nine children. According to the story, Dr. Swietlik and his wife take their nine children to adoration every week, and sometimes, their children will attend on their own, encouraging their friends to go with them and spend some time with the Lord.

This was such a beautiful story that warmed my heart when I read it, but now, after I heard about a wonderful occurrence that came about because of this story, I find that my heart is not only warm, but on fire with a blaze that I hope will spread to many other hearts as well.

My niece, Jenny, has begun Eucharistic Adoration at her parish and it is offered there every Tuesday from 9am to 5pm. Ever since the Adoration program began, she had been asking the school principal to consider having the school children take part on a regular basis. She called me yesterday with the most exciting news. It seems that the principal of her parish school had read the story about Dr. Swietlik and his family and has decided that, yes, the entire student body of St. Mary's in Waukesha will now be attending Eucharistic Adoration as part of their school day at least once a month!

I don't think that when Dr. Swietlik and his wife began taking their family to adoration, they had any idea of what a great example they would be setting not only for their children but, for so many others as well. Isn't it amazing how God can take one person or family and their love in action for Him, and use it to attract so many others to follow suit? What can you do, or are already doing, that might attract others to join you in building their own relationship with God?

To read the Catholic Herald story in its entirety, visit this link.

Faith-Filled Weekend

Whew! This past weekend flew by like a 747! But it's all good, because God was definitely in every minute of that flight.

I had the chance to spend the day with my four sons and a few friends on Saturday. It was the annual "Fire on the Hill St. John Bosco Youth Day" rally at Holy Hill Basilica in Hubertus, WI. This faith-filled day of music and speakers for teens set our hearts on fire, blazing like the bonfire that warmed us up in the 40 degree weather. But nothing could warm us like time spent confessing our sins and spending an hour in Eucharistic Adoration followed by Mass with Fr. Stan Fortuna.

In his homily, Fr. Stan was explaining how we can better understand what God's will is for us in this world. He said that the only way that we can hope to understand how God is working in our lives is to "turn it around." Instead of hoping to UNDERSTAND, we should be trying to STAND UNDER. Then he lifted the crucifix from the altar and held it over his head to show us that we are to stand under the cross, like Mary, and it is there where we will find God and realize how we are called to serve Him in this world.

Sunday afternoon, my family and I stood along a busy highway holding "Abortion Kills Children" signs for our local Life Chain in honor of Respect Life Sunday. Nine-year-old Mary kept us entertained by making up pro-life songs with lyrics like "You can stop abortion, yes you can!"

As the weather continues to be chilly in my part of the world, I was glad to sit down for a cup of coffee after that with a young girl who is preparing for her Confirmation this Spring and who has asked me to be her Sponsor. What a joy and an honor it is to be considered worthy to form the faith of someone who is serious about her relationship with the Lord!


Finally, St. Augustine parish is within walking distance of my home and they held a Transitus Service last night in honor of St. Francis of Assisi. I had never heard of Transitus before, so I was intrigued to learn more. My daughter, Mary, and I walked over and were pleased to take part in a solemn service in honor of this great saint! Mary noticed that the service began a lot like the Easter Vigil, in darkness. After Archbishop Listecki gave his homily, the pastor of the parish read the story of the passing of St. Francis from this life to the next while the altar candles were extinguished, one by one, leaving only one flame burning to represent the light of Christ that St. Francis reflected in this world. Then, from that one candle, every candle in church was lit. It was both beautiful and joyous!

And now, I am glad to land again on a normal Monday at work so that I can catch my breath from all of last weekend's excitement!