The de Chantal Society/St. Catherine of Siena

The de Chantal Society of St. Francis de Sales Seminary, led by Lydia LoCoco and Bishop Donald Hying, is now into its third year of bringing women in the Archdiocese together for an evening or morning of quiet prayer and reflection followed by socialization, three times each year.  The description found on the seminary website is quite lovely and enticing:

"We invite you to take a short respite that promises, like a breath of fresh air, to offer you silence, prayer, meditation and spiritual formation - time for you.

We are the de Chantal Society. Sponsored by Saint Francis de Sales Seminary and the Archdiocese of Milwaukee's Nazareth Project, our mission is to spiritually form and inspire Catholic women like St. Jane de Chantal, who are integral to our families, vocations and the Catholic Church.

We ask nothing of you (except prayer!). Our mission is to support you.  Please choose the gathering that works best for you."

Attending the de Chantal Society is one of my very favorite things to do.  Not only do I enjoy the quiet of silent prayer before our Eucharistic Lord, and the joy of fellowship with other Catholic women, but Bishop Hying never fails to inspire as he shares stories of the lives of women saints upon whom we can model our lives.  

At the most recent de Chantal Society gathering, Bishop Hying shared the story of St. Catherine of Siena of whom I knew very little, so I took careful notes and am happy to review them and share the gist of his reflection here.

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Quotes from St. Catherine of Siena:

"Love transforms one into what one loves."
"You are she who is not. I am He who is."
"If you are what you should be, you will set the world on fire."
"I am the fire and you are the sparks."

St. Catherine of Siena (source)

As far as saints are concerned, according to Bishop Hying, St. Catherine of Siena is in the stratosphere.  She was a mystic, which means that she had a direct knowledge of God obtained through subjective experience. She knew God, not just through an intellectual belief, but through a real human experience.  For St. Catherine, God was so real that she could actually reach out and touch Him, and then boldly act upon that vision.

Like many saints, St. Catherine of Siena only lived on this earth for a short time, dying at the age of 33.  It was almost as if a fiery explosion propelled her into the world, and like a meteor she flew through the heavens and then sparked out.  To be holy like St. Catherine and other saints who die young, Bishop Hying says it seems as if we have to "get it right quickly and then check out, because the longer we stay around, the more we mess it up."

She was born during the time of black death, on March 25th, 1347, was one of 22 children, many of whom died during infancy and childhood, and had a very strong will.  She had her first vision of God when she  was only five or six years old.  She saw Christ seated in His glory.  By age seven she vowed to give her whole life to God.  It's as if God reaches down and chooses certain souls to show us who He is, and St. Catherine was one of them.  There are two types of saints-those that are born holy and those who are wild and have a conversion.  St. Catherine was clearly of the first type.

She didn't feel called to marriage or to religious life.  In fact, when her sister died in childbirth, her family expected her to marry.  She performed a massive fast to get her way and avoid marrying her sister's widower. Eventually she became a Dominican Tertiary which was a mendicant order, meaning she didn't live in a convent or monastery, but remained in the world.  Most of the others in her order were older and lived in community, but she chose to live in a little shack in her parent's back yard.  She learned to read and lived in silence and solitude.  She demanded nothing for herself, rarely slept, and performed many long fasts often only eating the Eucharist.

At age 21 she had a mystical and emotional marriage with Jesus.  She wore a ring on her finger that no one else could see.  She took care of the poor in hospitals and homes.  People would often gather around her and she gave communal spiritual direction.  She was called to delve into the world as if God had pushed her to live an extension of His life.  Like St. Catherine, we, too, are called to be in the world but not of the world, by living in deep union with Jesus.

She advocated for reform of the clergy.  During her lifetime there was a schism in the Church with three separate popes. She felt empowered to go to the real pope and convince him to return from France to Rome.  How many people can go to the pope, tell him what to do, receive a personal audience and then watch as he follows their advice? The fact that St. Catherine was able to achieve this shows that true power doesn't come from office, it comes from holiness.

She was taken by the transcendence and immanence of God-He's above us, but also has entered into our experience, close to us and within us.  This is the amazing truth that before the world was created, each one of us was already loved in the mind and heart of God.  We exist and that is the ultimate expression of His love for us.  The trinity dwells in us through sanctifying grace; the astounding conviction that through the sacraments, God comes to live in us.

St. Catherine had a deep love for the Trinity and believed that heaven is standing at the heart of the Trinity. She knew that there is an overwhelming force of God's love for us to the point where we are moved to tears, where our head knowledge of God suddenly explodes in the heart.  St. Catherine's lived experience of God changed everything.  She said, "God pressed Himself into my being and that's who I am."  She had ecstasies that took her out of herself and transported her into the heart of God.  It is only for a few rare souls that this is possible on this side of death.

As a priest, Bishop Hying says that there are times during the elevation when the host is so light and times when it is heavy.  There are moments when he is unmoved and then at other times he is deeply moved by the Real Presence.  There are times when God seems close and other times when He seems far away.  The moments of grace are the times when, in a profound and real way, we feel His overwhelming love for us.  St. Catherine felt His overwhelming love all the time.

What matters for us today is that we take the things she teaches us and live them out.  St. Catherine of Siena shows us that God's love for us is prodigal, infinite, unending, divine fire.  We are to see ourselves as an extension of Jesus in the world.  St. Catherine was so submerged in God that there was a fine line separating the two.  Her divine power came from the Lord using her, but God is the one who is; she is the one who is not.

To read Catherine's works is daunting and overwhelming, but she has something to say to all of us, and that is that throughout her life she took the next step and stayed true to herself because she knew who she was in God's eyes.  Holiness doesn't make us odd.  Like St. Catherine of Siena, holiness makes us beautiful.

Riverwest Food Pantry

"For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in."  ~Matthew 25:35

"Statistics are human beings with the tears wiped off."  ~Paul Brodeur 

"To ensure that no one lacks bread, water, clothing, housing, work, health we need to recognize each other as children of the heavenly Father and so as brothers to each other, and conduct ourselves accordingly."  ~Pope Francis

Chef Paul, Sous Chef John, First Cook Mary

For the past eight months, my family and I have been spending the first Saturday mornings of the month volunteering at our parish's Riverwest Food Pantry.  It has been a beautiful opportunity for Paul and I to teach our children the importance of giving the gift of our time and love to others, as well as an opportunity to begin to build relationships with the poor in our community and to come to learn that despite any differences we might have, we really have a great deal in common with those who struggle with poverty, as we are all God's beloved children.

The Riverwest Food Pantry, under the direction of Vincent Noth, has been looking to expand its services beyond the simple distribution of food, and has developed a Health and Wellness Committee led by volunteer Jean De Vita.  One of the goals that the Health and Wellness Committee hopes to achieve is to teach the clients who regularly use the food pantry how to prepare healthy, low cost meals at home. Since my husband, Paul, and I, both have backgrounds in the food and nutrition industry, Paul as a chef, and myself as a dietetic technician working as a nutritionist for the WIC (Women, Infants and Children) Program, we were eager to help in this regard.

Last Saturday, the Riverwest Food Pantry held its first-ever food demonstration.  Paul, myself, and most of our five children, prepared a vegetarian chili recipe that was high in protein, yet low in calories, fat and sodium.  Paul offered a quick demonstration on preparing the chili and explained its versatility in regards to adding or eliminating ingredients or using it for other menu items such as a tortilla filling or a stuffed pepper ingredient. We offered chili samples to all of the food pantry clients and Vincent had copies of the recipe prepared for the clients to take home with them.  In addition, many of the recipe ingredients could be found at the food pantry so that the clients could more easily prepare the recipe for themselves in the upcoming week if they so desired.

My family and I had so much fun working together to serve our brothers and sisters in Christ in this very simple and easy endeavor, and we look forward to offering many more nutritious food demonstrations in the future.  I ask you to please support the Riverwest Food Pantry, or your own local food pantry, with your prayers, your gifts of food, time and service, and your financial donations, not only during this upcoming sacrificial season of Lent, but always.

Please visit the Riverwest Food Pantry website here to learn more.

Chef Paul's Vegetarian Chili-12 servings 
(a great meatless entree for Ash Wednesday!)

1 15oz can Kidney beans, drained and rinsed

1 15 oz can Black beans, drained and rinsed

1 15 oz can Pinto beans, drained and rinsed

1 15 oz can Garbanzo beans, drained and rinsed

1 cup frozen corn

1 green bell pepper, diced

1 red or white onion, diced

½ cup diced celery

1 T. minced garlic or ½  tsp. garlic powder

1 28 oz can diced tomatoes

1 12 oz can tomato paste

1 cup water

1 T. chili powder

¼ tsp. cayenne pepper

Optional:  ½ cup sliced fresh mushrooms

Combine all ingredients.  Bring to a boil.  Reduce heat, cover and simmer for 30 minutes or until all flavors are blended and vegetables are soft, stirring occasionally.

Yield:  12 servings 1-1/2 cup each

Nutrition Information per serving:  200 calories, 2 g fat, 95 mg sodium, 20 g carbohydrate, 5 g fiber, 6 g protein

Note:  1 pkg. chili seasoning can replace the chili powder and cayenne but keep in mind that the sodium content will increase. And all beans can be substituted-for example-use four cans kidney beans or 2 cans black beans and 2 cans garbanzo beans, etc.

Look For the Helpers

source:  Razoo Blog

On Wednesday,  January 22nd this world lost a good and wonderful man, Edward Slattery, to head and neck cancer, after a hard-fought battle lasting about three years.  I had written about Ed last year when there was a fund-raiser held at St. Florian Parish in West Milwaukee to help raise money to pay for the medical bills from his long-lasting cancer treatment.  Ed's story was also featured in the Milwaukee Catholic Herald, and this year, just a short time before he died, the Milwaukee Catholic Herald included Ed's story in their list of the most inspiring stories of the year.

Over the course of the last year, from the time we first learned about Ed's cancer, our family held him deep in our daily prayers. My daughter, Mary, prayed especially intensely for a miraculous healing, and she believed that God would surely help Ed to become a cancer survivor.  We had gone to visit Ed several times, and for my 12-year-old daughter, it was extremely difficult for her to see how rapidly the cancer spread and deeply he suffered.

After we received the unbelievably tragic news that Ed had died, I found my daughter hugging the family cat and overheard her talking to him, saying, "Roo, do you get God?  I think He's mean."  For Mary, the thought that God would not will for Ed's complete healing was unfathomable. I struggled to find the right way to help her to accept that God does not always answer our prayers in the way we would want or expect Him to.  I wanted her to understand that even though sad and tragic things happen in life, God is only good and only Love, and He suffers right along with us when we weep and mourn.

I thought of Mr. Rogers and his kind and gentle way of explaining everything in life.  I remembered his often quoted statement about "looking for helpers" during tragedies and I was able to comfort Mary with the fact that in the suffering that Ed endured, she was a helper. Her prayers, her visits, and her loving concern, all helped Ed to cope with his cancer, to know that he was loved, and to move toward his inevitable death with peace. God used Mary to help Ed, and Mary willingly complied with God's use of her in giving her compassion and love so generously.

It was easy to see that Ed had many such helpers along his journey with cancer.  In his life filled with selfless giving, so many others came to know and love Ed, and wanted to give back to him. He never seemed to have a shortage of helpers, most notably in his beautiful wife, Lisa.  If I were to choose an example of a perfect marriage, I would look to Lisa and Ed.  Lisa never left Ed's side for one minute during his illness. She loved him and cared for him and believed in him.  She did everything she possibly could to give him comfort and support and to promote his healing.  She relied heavily upon prayer, and despite the fact that physical healing didn't come, the prayer that she and Ed shared surely fostered a spiritual healing that carried Ed into the arms of God upon his departure from this earthly home.

When we attended Ed's funeral, we found a packed funeral home for the wake, and an even more packed church for the Mass.  There was not a dry eye to be found as Ed had touched so many lives in this corner of the world.  Some of his siblings, and all four of his young sons, all spoke about what a wonderful man Ed was, and, before the Mass ended, over 100 young men that Ed had coached in basketball, including two of my sons, stood at the foot of the altar in tribute to the man who had taught them not just how to play a game, but also how to make their way through life with perseverance, passion and hard work.

In his life, Ed had been a helper to many, and in his sickness, so many people were able to return that help to him.  Now, in his death, those helpers continue to pray for his soul and for his surviving family.

My daughter and I are learning to look for the helpers in every situation and to be willing to be a helper to all. And in our helping, we are bringing the love of God to the world around us. What an honor it is to help God, to bring his healing to those who suffer through our words and actions, to pray for those we care about and even for those we don't know so well.

Look for the helpers.  They are each of us and they are everywhere.

Eternal rest grant unto Ed Slattery, O Lord, and let perpetual light shine upon him.  May Ed's soul, and all of the souls of the faithful departed, through the mercy of God, rest in peace.  Amen.

The Slattery Family

Hold On

When my boys were little I thought that mothering was so terribly difficult.  I cried to God about weaning and toilet-training and sleepless nights and piles of laundry.  I didn't think easy would ever come along.  But somewhere along the line I forgot about the temper tantrums, the fevers, and the picky eating.  But not the piles of laundry.  The laundry always seemed to linger.

Those old trials were exchanged for new ones-homework battles, bullies and defiance became the school-aged challenges, added to the growing pile of laundry.

And now, my three oldest, well they're becoming fine young men.  I think they should be well-prepared to make their entrance into the world as independent adults, but not just yet.  I'm not quite done holding on to them and loving them through the birthing process.  I'm still laboring and I'm still doing laundry.  But this laboring, this birthing adults, has challenges of its own that I couldn't possibly foresee when I was simply (simply! ha!) pushing them out of the womb and into the earthly air.  The challenges of teaching them to drive, helping them to discern their life vocations, and walking with them through the world of women brings mothering to a whole new level of joy and sorrow intertwining.

not my actual car, but this is pretty much what it looks like now

Last weekend, on the slippery, icy roads, a car was crashed.  It was my car.  My sweet, new-to-me Hyundai Sonata with a sun-roof car that I've only owned for a year.  My first car that wasn't a van in over 20 years.  My car that was fashionable and sporty and yet could still fit groceries for a family of seven in the trunk.  My car that just had an oil change, a full tank of gas and a car wash.  I thank God that there were no injuries, but I can't help but mourn for the loss of the vehicle I loved.  Detachment is such a difficult challenge. Sometimes God has to physically pry our hands loose from the material so that He can get a message through our thick heads, doesn't He?

And today His message to me is coming through loud and clear.  That message is "Hold on.  You're not done birthing your boys yet.  The best part is yet to come-the part where they give back to you, where they hold your hand and carry you through your own trials, the payoff where you can take a little bit of satisfaction in a job well-done."

In the absence of my own car, my two oldest sons, just 19 and 20 years old, have been rising at 6 AM to take their mother to daily Mass and then drive me to work.  It's precious time, that 15 minute drive in the early morning; time when my sons can open up to me about their lives in private conversations; time when we can thank and praise the Lord together as we participate in Mass; time when they can offer the gift of their loving care and gratitude to their mother for the many sacrifices that she has made for them.  And I love it.

I don't think I'll be too hasty about shopping for a new car.  I think I'll take my time and enjoy the gift of simplicity and family love that one less vehicle in the household brings about.  And as I linger on the joyful thought of these moments of early morning time with my sons, I'll be sure to thank God for the gift of holding on for just a little while longer before they leave the nest for homes of their own.  And I might just offer that prayer of thanksgiving while I'm folding the most recent pile of laundry!  That would really be gratitude!

(Dear Reader, if you, like me, struggle to detach from your own vehicles, you might enjoy this post:  Dear Anonymous.  And make sure you read the post to which that one was responding, here, at Inside Out.

Daffodils

google images

In the midst of a snowstorm 

I remember the long forgotten daffodil bulbs 

planted last fall,

just waiting to burst forth into bloom 

at the first touch of the warmth of spring, 

and I smile. 

Like the daffodil, 

we are all waiting to burst forth

 into new life

 at the gentlest touch 

of our beloved Creator's hand.

Stretch out Your hand, O Lord! 

Bring us to new life in You! 

Re-create our souls to bring glory to You alone!

In the Time of Old Age

"Do not cast me off in the time of old age; forsake me not when my strength is spent."  ~Psalm 71:9

“You shall stand up before the gray head and honor the face of an old man, and you shall fear your God: I am the Lord."  ~Leviticus 19:32

Carl from the Disney Pixar movie "Up"

The Apostleship of Prayer intention of Pope Francis for this month is that "The Church and society may respect the wisdom and experience of older people."  In a particular way, I have been challenged to help bring this intention to fruition in my own life, as my family and I are discerning how best to help our wonderful elderly neighbors of twenty-two years who have been in great need of extra care in recent months.  Don't we all know someone advanced in years who could benefit from a little extra love and attention from every possible source, whether that person seeks out the attention they desire or quietly and patiently wait for others to take notice?

Several years ago, when my children were still in Catholic grade school, we made the habit of attending the daily 7 AM Mass at our parish.  The daily Mass crowd, made up of many of the elderly members of the parish, delighted to see children at prayer, and my family quickly developed many friendships among those we'd pray with each day.  One woman in particular, Mrs. B., easily became our favorite.  Mrs. B., the mother of 13 children, treated my own family as though we, too, were her own flesh and blood.  She'd send cards and money to each of the children on their birthdays, attended their 8th grade graduation Masses and Confirmations, brought gifts at Christmas and throughout the year, and best of all, lavished us with deep embraces from  which we continue to feel the warmth to this day.  A few months ago, I attended a funeral Mass for a beloved priest from my former parish who had passed away.  I chose a discreet seat in the back of the church, and during the first song when everyone turned to the back of the church for the entrance procession, Mrs. B. spotted me, left her seat near the front, and came to sit next to me.  She held my hand for the entire Mass.  Mrs. B. is so easy to love!

But not all elderly adults exude warmth and joy so easily.  In my young adult days, early in my dietetics career, I worked as a food service director at a nursing home. Many of the residents I served seemed discontent and dissatisfied, constantly complaining and criticizing, so much so that I came to fear them, cringing as I waited to learn what it was that my staff and I were doing wrong that upset them so.  As I grew older and watched my own parents age, I came to better understand the general dissatisfaction of this generation who worked so hard their entire lives, only to struggle during their senior years as they are forced to give up all that had been important to them in this world including their material gains, their health and their relationships.  That kind of forced detachment is enough to bring out the cranky side in the kindest of souls.

Others are truly the tragic victims of elderly abuse and neglect.  After giving their entire lives over to the care of their children, they now find themselves alone, forgotten and unloved.  Facing major decisions regarding their health and their living environment, they choose to remain in the one place that brings them security-their own home.  Closed in upon themselves, their world becomes small and they are filled with fear that won't be eased.  Loneliness, regret and sorrow become their daily bread.

In this month dedicated to prayer for the elderly, I'm challenged to step out of my comfort zone, to reach out to the elderly people I know, to offer them love, affection and kindness.  Won't you join me in showing love and concern to people in their "golden years"?  Could you bring your children for a visit to your nearby nursing home and listen to the residents share stories from their youth?  Perhaps you could bring a meal to an elderly neighbor?  Might you offer a ride to church or to a doctor's appointment for someone who is no longer able to drive?  Would a gift of service doing housework or yard work for someone whose strength no longer allows them to keep up with basic chores be appreciated?

As we dedicate the month of February to prayer for those who are older and wiser than we are, let's not forget to follow that spiritual prayer with the prayer of action, and show our love for the elderly in our midst with our words and our deeds.  Life is an amazing adventure-both the good and the not-so-good parts of it, and the older and wiser people that God has placed in our paths enrich our adventure with every interaction we have with them.  Let's make sure we do our part to share in the lives of the elderly who are with us now, before they're gone, and we, too, are filled with loneliness, regret and sorrow.

Sanctuary and Sustenance

He buried his face 

in the baptismal font

slurping the holy water like a dog,

shouting incomprehensibly about

the Infant's swaddling clothes,

and when he approached the altar

the fear in our hearts

swelled at this bizarre behavior.

He was asked to leave

 the sanctuary of

church and went out

into the bitter cold.

But me, I sit

for hours upon hours

gaze shifting from

tabernacle to crucifix, 

to saintly statues and stained glass,

silently relishing

the sustenance of

the Bread of Angels

and the Cup of Salvation

before going out

on my own accord

into the bitter cold.